Protagonistas:

>Trevor Nash (alias: Tribilin)
Classification in the criminal ranking: 7
-now a washed-up drunkard
-honest worker, based fighter

Weapons:
Owen Owada (alias: papaoso)
Classification in the criminal ranking: challenging for 6

-No one more rebellious than him and his hairstyle
-Owen knows about girls

Weapons:
Catherine Montenegrino (Alias: nigga cat)
Classification in the criminal ranking: 7
-a determined girl in a world of crazy people
-esoteric, smart, pretty and autistic a great catch with decadent sanity

Weapons:
Angélica Johnson. (Alias: meona)
Classification in the criminal ranking: 7
-stupid kid with karate skills
-accepting that if she wants to live, she must fight

Weapons:
Helena Vasileiou/John Doe (code name: Paris)
-quit, but the door will stay open for quite some time if she wants to come back

Represented by: Carmelita also kek

>>123701
Ayy
You traveled from Charia to the Vegas in 5 minutes. The problem? You were broke... but you had a solution.

IN CHARIA

>Carmelita
"¡Carmelita Buttowski, ttowski!"

She's at her house. She enters the scene on a skateboard holding a big bag of Doritos and a bottle of Mountain Dew. Doing an ollie, she jumps onto her couch.

"CHEU NA-NANA CAR-MELOWSKI."

click -turns on the TV- "Let's see what's on."

>Nick
"We're back with victorius."

>Carmelita
"Are they still doing that?"

>Tori Vega
"Aw, I really want to culear. status: ovulating."

>Carmelita
"What the hell? I didn't remember it like that."

click

>Cartoon Network
"Now we're back with: Teen Titans Go."

>Carmelita
"NOP."

click

>Boss Baby channel
"¡Boss Baby back in business!"

>Carmelita
"I already saw that."

>History channel
"Now: the price of history."

>Carmelita
"Are they still doing that shit?"

https://youtu.be/XkxK0PKaJUU?si=CiQlzMsi2aZUV7Mo▾
>Narrator
"Today's episode is live recorded."

>Rick
"In my store, the first thing is family... and then comes money. But it depends on who you ask."

>Carmelita
"Meh... I guess there's no other option..."

She opens her Doritos.

"Why do I talk to myself so much?"

She starts eating, when then...

>Rick
"This guy said he had an object of pure quality. Something we've never seen... if it's true, it could cost us a lot of money... or work out very well. Haha... Let's see what happens. I'm a little nervous."

>Carmelita
"Hmm qué sherá." -says with her mouth full-

Trevor enters through the door.

"PFFFFFFFFFFFT" -spits out the Doritos-

>Rick
"Haha. Good job buddy, what do we have here?"

Carmelita leans against the screen.

>Carmelita
"¡¿WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING THERE?!"

She gets up quickly, takes out her phone and dials rapidly before holding it to her ear.

"I want a spaceship or something that goes really fast!" -mimimi says the phone- "To Vegas, now!" -mimimi- "NOW!"

Carmelita cut the call and ran out of her house.

...

In the pawn shop...

https://youtu.be/OiMca9E376k?si=_SgJq_BMd_XRHOh5▾
You entered the pawn shop. The place overflowed with luxury wherever you looked. Rows of glass cases filled with jewelry, frames full of rare stamps, autographed photos or collectible cards were common here. Pure collector quality concentrated.

But you weren't here for the views, you were here to sell or pawn. Big time. WITH BALLS. You pass by those generic vendors who aren't part of the program and go straight to the ones who greeted you as soon as you passed through the door.

>Rick
"Haha. Good job buddy, what do we have here?"

The very same bald guy Rick greets you, along with Chomlí, who was hanging around in the back. You were lucky, the old garka wasn't in sight, which made the tremendous scam you were about to pull off easier. With a smile, the fat bald guy extends his hand waiting for you to shake it and show what you think you're selling. Which makes him ask the question of the day.

"Are you here to sell or pawn it?"

Here began the price duel...

>>123846
>>123847
Halloween night makes heretics come out. Or in this case, the little witch who's made out of your sister. You stroke her head, she lowers it slightly, not refusing, but when she straightens up, a 'hm' comes out of her straight lips that doesn't indicate much pleasure.

>Lynn
"...thank you..."

Still, she thanks you. But she's not entirely in agreement with being treated like a little girl. This time she lets it pass because you looked too happy to break your illusion. Carla is the second to let out a 'hm'... You never do that to her.

Otherwise: lunch. Lunch is important. And when you get used to someone to something, like getting your sister used to preparing it for you, you'd have to expect what came: she asked you directly. You hadn't prepared it, maybe you could have spent the time lying down on it, but you can't go back to the past.

But you could compensate, her open hand receives something different than a small lunch. A Grant that leaves Carla speechless and even makes Lynn open her almost always closed eyes a little.

Carla
"¿Catherine...?"

You were slow to respond, and she didn't wait long to call your name. She feels discarded, you sit down and face her... putting on a serious face. You can't see the faces she makes under that blanket... but well.

Carla: queen of crows
-Carla can ask her crows to bring things to help you.
*food/medicine: consumable items to heal yourself
*money: some money to spend
*random object: an object that doesn't fall into any of the other two categories. The quality of this varies a lot
-this is a partner ability, it improves by increasing the classic lovemeter.
>Carla's lovemeter: 90% kek

"When do you fight against number 6, Cathy?" -she asks, tilting her head with interest- "Can I go see you fight sometime?" -she asks, throwing punches into the air-

They reach Carla's school. She's surprised. She looks towards the same school, then again at you.

"Uh... so fast...? Uh... really have to attend? Je... It's Halloween. It should be a holiday."

She says, it's up to you.

>>123914
Between compliments, some information that had been hidden from you comes out. You should already know that Mariana hides some things... the question is how much she hides.

>Mariana
Mariana. Lovemeter: 10% yes, she's waifeable, you can also break her little heart

You're alone. It's time to... buy!

>☆☆☆loading...☆☆☆

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6eanxSWdY_E▾
Pro tip: the lovemeter unlocks powers from 50% and goes up in levels

>☆☆☆load complete☆☆☆

https://youtu.be/yNwKYgM6SkM?si=_G-Y606epHd4JvqE▾
The hispacentral mall! Huge, extensive, some would say with an infinite interior. Made for you to find any of the groceries you might want without OP having to come up with places

There's everything, own stores, cafes, cars on display... It's a proper shopping mall. This place would have been a much better meeting point for a date than the puticlub or maybe even the ice cream shop. But past is past and it doesn't interest us.

You go to an area where ingredients abound and pass through the checkout. The old man in front of you has been there for 10 minutes and counting, trying various cards one after another.

>Old man
"Eh... and this...?"

The cashier swipes the card. It's declined.

>Nigga cashier
"NIGGA...! this is the fuckin' card number 27."

>Old man
"Ah... and do you accept credit...?"

>Nigga cashier
"Yo, let me see, chamo, you're trying to fuck with me weon. All those were credit cards, niggaaa."

>Old man
"And this...?"

>People behind you
"¡AAAGH!"

The black cashier pulls out a walkie talkie.

>Nigga cashier
"Take him, chamo."

Security grabs the old man by the arms and begins to take him away.

>Security
"Come on, sir. We'll take you to play bingo."

>Old man
"How pleasant younglings."

After that unnecessary thing, the nigga says: 'next' and you can put your things. This starts scanning the items.

>Nigga
"Niggahuevos..." -the people look at him weird- "a gallon of Niggaleche..." -the people look EVEN weirder- "a little Niggazúcar and Niggarina." -nods his head- "that would be 10 fuckin' niggadollars, mini-nigga."

You pay. The nigga makes duck lips and waves the bills in front of him.

"Of this we were talking, niggaaaa. The min-inniga sure knows how to get a fuckin' dollar. ¡AND IF SOMEONE ELSE IS THINKING ABOUT PAYING WITH A CARD, THEY CAN JUST PUT IT WELL IN THE DEEP OF-!"

>Another nigga at another register
"Take him." -says to a walkie talkie-

Security takes the cashier away.

>Security
"Come on, we'll take him where there's plenty of KFC."

>Nigga
"¡No, wait!, ¡I know what they're doing to us!" -they drag him against his will- "¡NIGGAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Another Nigga appears from the side and takes the place of the previous one.

>New nigga
"Next, please."

After that other unnecessary thing, you can leave.

<current money: $40

1/2

>>123914
María's words echo in your head...

>Mariana (past)
"Ah... Today I ran into a guy dressed as a vampire looking for number 7. I told him I'm her representative and he said you should go to the improvement workshop on SantaClos street."

...When did he say that?

"at the ice cream shop! But there was no place to write it down."

...ah, well.

>New interest point unlocked on the map: improvement workshop

Anyway. After that adventure in the hispacentro mall, you had arrived at the most terrifying place in the world... The employment center.

A neon sign that no longer works, with some letters about to fall, announces the place as the 'employment center' you're looking for. The lack of any other clue about its nature makes it look suspicious, like a clandestine restaurant where they cook endangered species... but well, you needed the money desperately, there was no room for fear, and as the seventh strongest in the country, in all honesty you shouldn't have it.

Clink clink you cross the door and a bell announces your arrival, dispelling any possible concern, you're greeted by a rather nice atmosphere. Planters with well cared for plants adorn the room, distracting a bit from the occasional crack you see in the white floor that, otherwise, is free of the slightest detail. The center is a place for a table and its chairs, all empty, but exists as the balance between work and rest that every employer should remember.

But of course, all this is decoration, you must go directly to the counter to talk to whoever was there... Who was... A monitor attached to the wall through a hydraulic arm, capable of moving through the air with movements that remind you of GladOs

>Oracle
"Hello... I am the oracle. Your employer... I have read your file, Angelica. It has arrived. Yes... You have a file... In this disgusting system called the world, the powerful have everyone registered in different places... They play with our data as if they were a currency. Ohh yes. But mine... Ohh no. Because I am the most anti-system being there, Viceroy... Oh yes... And if you follow me... You will become one too. You will be able to escape the matrix as I did... And you will no longer be a joke for the dirty politicians."

-...- "eh... Sorry I can't be in person, by the way. I'm in the comfort of my house, at my battle station playing video games- I mean... fighting the system with high level quantum hacks."

"But you can already start going against the system... Just check the jobs listed on the announcement board over there. They are special assignments left for number 7. And they are totally anti-system. Not like a dirty office job for poor average sheep..."

Interesting... What kind of job could be capable of guiding you out of the matrix and making you a redpilled basada?

As you approach the announcement board on the wall to find out you found the following:

>super coconut collector
Location: next to Charia beach
-There is a high demand for super coconuts, but not anyone can get them. You are paid for each coconut obtained.
lawn mower
Location: patio of a guy
-A important war veteran needs you to mow his lawn because it looks like a jungle, the association promised to send someone. We provide you with the mower.
<payment: $1000 guaranteed if the garden looks nice.

...these are some of the most mundane jobs you could imagine. But they pay well... $1000 for mowing the lawn! With that you pay the fee and you have extra for... eh... something. But not to escape the matrix.

Finally home. Long day kek
I'll respond tomorrow, Owen. It wouldn't be strange not to be able to send shift one day, but I'm making this post to say that after Friday I'll stop working for the year and will be more free... So we can roll more! Yeepiiii
I don't know why our pace increased so much, but maybe something kek.
Shifts tomorrow. I'm exhausted.

>>3368
"Yo... I gotta go."

The "owww" that answers her sounds more like a cat meowing for dinner than a broken heart. She steps onto the swing plank and curls up, hugging her knees, making the swing look like it's rocking a sad human croquette. Her first date lasted less than recess.

"Eh... let's meet another time."

Her pupils shrink to pinholes; the mere idea stitches a little optimistic smile onto her face.

"¡Maria!"

Inb4: WHAT!?

"Didn't we go to the same school, same schedule, same entrance?"

"...but... like, I mean..."

She tilts her head like a hawk sizing up its prey.

"Like what?" She squints one eye. "Like a..." With a clumsy flutter of fingers she tears through the air in loops and spirals; like an orchestra conductor, she forms letter by letter: "a DATE?"

The swing stops with a nyick. Even the wind got curious.

"Bye."

With the creak of the swing wood bidding her farewell, she hops up and declares, as a postscript:

"You, me: Let's go get candy tomorrowaa!"

She yells, too late to the air that's already replaced her.

Without another glance, she goes the wrong way and gets lost in the woods for twenty minutes; after a goodbye like that, anyone would rather negotiate with branches than with their own pride. Going back to ask for directions would be admitting she's an idiot, and she's not an idiot by a hair, no sir.

>>>Three hours later~

Barging through, she carves her path through the trenches of the market; what promised to be a graceful five-minute expedition drags on to twenty, wandering in a limbo of cans and bags. Drumming her fingers, glissando her wristwatch, she waits for the man with slave rubbery skin to take pity on her impatience.

"Ah... Do you accept credit...?"

"Ajjhh" He throws his arms open like a preacher in sermon: "Please!"

Security justifies his salary by finally purging the old man to the nearest geriatric Bingo. She empties her lungs, comforted, pays her share, and shoves a crumpled, patched-up ten-dollar Hamilton bill forward.
"that'd be 10 fucking nigga-dollars, mini-nigga."

"Nigga-thanks!"

>New item unlocked!: N-World.

She leaves satisfied, shaking her body at intervals like a wet dog. Poison ivy crawls up her sleeve like a free souvenir from the ecosystem. Her wild odyssey left her with green tattoos and the certainty that nature just doesn't like her.

>>>You're old enough to get a job!

Not even a blink in the rankings and the bloodsuckers are already circling. She recalls the aggressive offer in her memory: a weirdo looking for a fight, and so helpful, he'll show her the shortest path to the floor. First things first, no muscle, no capital, all that stuff stays in fairy tales; her last brawl taught her that ranking disputes aren't any kind of hobby.

(Waiiit, when did he say that?)

She scrapes her temple with a finger, as if clearing cobwebs from her thoughts.

>"At the ice cream shop! But there was no room to write it down."

(Really...?) She doubts her subconscious in the same millisecond she convinces herself: if the mind whispers certainty, obedience takes over (I once read that voices never lie).

She shrugged, her sixth sense rarely errs.

Just two suburbs over, she steps into enemy territory, the place where her brand-new primary title isn't worth even wrapping a burger combo. A cemetery of ambitions, where resumes rot in silence. The Chariense Employment Center.

The moment she enters, her greeting crumbles: from the effusive "Hi!" to the faded "Can I work at something that doesn't involve serving burgers or coffee?" These places live off adolescent sadomasochism; they squeeze innocence until it's as wilted as a lemon left in the corner of the fridge.

She takes two steps back when her interlocutor is nothing more than a screen; initial surprise shifts to bending at the waist, watching with great interest the final boss of the home office.

Oh no. Because I'm the most anti-system being there is, Viceroy... Oh yes... And if you follow me... you'll be one too. You'll escape the matrix like me... And you'll no longer be a joke for the dirty politicians.
He points at him threateningly with his finger, so close that the obese guy could feel his employment contract trembling in fear.

"C.O.M.M.I.E!" He sharpens a furious glare. "Nice try. Your subversive ideas might work on weak minds, but NOT ON ME, my parents embraced me."

He glances sideways for a punishment, rubbing his hands as he sees the appetizing response within reach. With a sudden yank, he tears the touch console from the machine and tucks it under his armpit amidst a torrential shower of sparks. He calculates that such sophisticated technology should survive at least a few minutes of abuse.

"I'll show you the wonders of capitalism, Oloraculo," he pronounces deliberately mispronouncing it. "Everyone can be reformed, that's what the American Dream taught me."

Delirium after prejudice, Oracle and Angélica set off on an adventure. He'll teach her how to make money the old-fashioned way.

>>>Off-screen!

The law of the jungle is an outdated relic of old sludge. Contemporary times are ruled by the idiosyncrasy of intelligence, not the tyranny of force. He searched and searched for where his prodigious mind would be valued: McHispa? Too black. Hispamart? Too white. The signal arrived in the form of a flyer: "ROOSTER FIGHT — FREE ENTRY."

Luck threw him a bone. Angélica would prove her point by attending the only place where money screams, bleeds, and multiplies: a clandestine animal fight.

On the way, he stopped at a vet and bought his champions from the highest bidder: a withered plant, a goldfish, a wrench, and, last but not least, his secret weapon. Each carefully calibrated, qualitatively and quantitatively in damage, resistance, and capacity to shatter expectations. He could smell it. That night, Angélica would be disgustingly rich.

Minutes later, he was in a shed that made chemical toilets look like spas. The floor dripped with humidity, the walls exhaled old urine, and a bare bulb hung from the ceiling, flickering every few seconds with the same enthusiasm as an employee about to quit. The air was tainted by a broth of cheap cigarette smoke, body armpit stench, and corridos tumbados. Angélica blinked in bursts. As if she were processing a 404 error in real time. Her gaze said what her nose denied: "Success always starts smelling like failure."
https://youtu.be/3pPR6IOV7Rg?si=N3b5un9FpqmxwId-▾When it was his turn to challenge the undefeated champion, he didn't hesitate, raised a shoebox like an Olympic torch and roared at the top of his lungs:

"Pikachu, I choose you!"

Gazes crossed like confused flies under a spotlight. Others exchanged stifled laughs. One inopportune coughed, if that was a joke it wasn't funny.

What came out with snout held high and back bristling was a hamster so small it fit in a fist.

With a wing-flap, the feathered one took a step forward, tilting its neck with the same curiosity a child shows a power outlet.

The hamster looked at Viceroy. Viceroy eyed the hamster. For a second, he thought something epic was about to happen. And it happened: the rooster devoured it in less than three pecks.

"Well... that was fast"

Bettor 1: That was pathetic.

"In my current state I can't beat him..."

Bettor 2: What are you talking about, stupid blonde? Who let you in?

"Seems like playing fair won't get me anywhere, it'll be two against one"

Planting the basketball players, he set the flowerpot at one end of the ring and beside it the fishbowl with a fish floating belly-up. The numerical advantage was on his side, he couldn't lose.

"Gardevoir, use Pinch-Spore!"

He alternated his gaze to his other boy.

"Magikarp, Stanislavski method!"

His odds of winning were astronomical, at least in the parallel universe where plants bite and fish know how to box. Plant and water against muscle and feathers: on paper, a lethal squad. In the ring, more like a themed lunch.

His hope of winning two thousand dollars is left at the mercy of those two.

If you don't like the OPato scene you can retcon and say it was just to the coconuts kek

>Gardevoir:
1d100 = 43

>Magikarp:
1d100 = 38

-Horos: $0.

>>123952
I'll only respond to important parts from previous scenes to close this already
>Alexa
Onigawara
Alexa
"Jo-jo, those would be you guys, ameritards. Have you fried your brains so much with so much frying that you don't realize? I'm from Ingl*terra, land of tea and oh God save the queen. I thought I had already told you, bocachanclas."

Onigawara
"¿Eh?" -looks confused- "¿Lechuqué?"

>Alexa
Onigawara
"Jojoo sí. Good idea."

>Alexa
"¿To whom?"

>Onigawara
"To Date."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bYaWmYoSSVo▾
>Alexa
"¿To Date?"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bYaWmYoSSVo▾
"Damn, it seems like it's going to rain." -says, with so much thunder...-

Onigawara nods his head.

"...And who is that? Christ, I arrived in this country this year and started school yesterday!, Do you know his name, where he lives, works, regularly goes to, or at least if he goes to this school, what class he goes to...?"

>Onigawara
"Uh..." -looks at you- "Do we know...?"

Well... No.

...

Shoot ten birds with three shots without sweating. Then, the doors open and all the passengers, alive or dead, burst out of the vehicle. It was your turn... you ran and jumped off the battle bus, starting an epic free fall. The bus explodes for no reason behind you just to make this scene more worthy of a photo before you hit the ground in an loud and epic superhero fall. Unlike your friend, who probably broke his spine.

>Onigawara
Save?
>Yes
>Saved successfully

After a good save you leave the restroom. Finally you help Onigawara to stand up, as he tries to stand up, his back makes a very bad sound.

"Agh damn..."

Fortunately he always walks bent over. But probably should visit a chiropractor... It was time to face number 6.

>[Elipsis]

Kaguya
Onigawara
"Ja..."

>Kaguya
"Do you think this is a joke...?"

Onigawara simulates coughing. He disengages from the accusations, after that, the kunoichi invites them to follow her.

Onigawara
Kaguya
Kaguya
<You're mistaken, I destroy nerds, not trees.

"Destroy... that's what matters."

<Does that type matter that much to you to be in this damn ranking? Christ, you're an obsessive girl.

"It's about my family... My honor... my donuts as the last member of my clan... I must take revenge. It's my reason to fight... to move forward..."

<Your position will fall into good hands, if I manage to reach number one, I guarantee that I'll kill the bastard you want to kill...

"...thank you." -says after a silence in which, with her serene inexpressiveness, she doesn't let you decipher how she feels- "...but I won't hold back."

BATTLE BEGINS!
in the next post for convenience
1/2

>>123952
You were alone with her. Onigawara becomes invisible when both of you focus on each other, that thread of conversation finally burns out, and you are the resulting explosion of the conflict.

https://youtu.be/gbsOWRXaz38?si=UNR0Qiqc190tbNcz▾
You move your wrist, your bat accelerates until it combusts, covered in bright flames that alert the ninja. You see her tensing her calves preparing her guard and counterattack, but when you trace a cut through the air, you completely ignore her general direction and release the handle of your weapon toward one of the tall tree tops in the sky. The turbo bat flies and spins on its own axis, becoming a swirling tornado of fire ascending diagonally toward a sequoia.

>Kaguya
(!)

A sign of exclamation flies over her coconut as, even with her eyelids always down, she perceives what you're trying to do.

(It will burn down the whole forest!)

(I have to stop him!)

She jumps impressively. Inhumanly, she disappears from Onigawara's view by propelling herself to the heights in a fraction of a second, her sword ready to deflect your weapon. When you appeared.

"¡¿How?!"

You arrive even before her or the motorized bat, you jump and intercept your weapon that was spinning at revolutions making it look like nothing more than a red tornado. You recover the handle, the motor roars, Kaguya is completely defenseless!

(¡I have to block-!)

As her elbows respond tensing slightly anticipating creating a barrier with her weapon, your arms, propelled by abundant testosterone and the motor of your turbo bat, had already surpassed her thought and covered the distance to hit her...

POOOW

You hit directly in her face, the fire consumes her head before you apply more force and force her to descend with you without her separating from the sharp bat. Together you fall consumed in flames in a meteoric descent.

100 meters of fall. Vertigo speeds and unmeasured violence. They are a catastrophe about to occur, Onigawara steps back.

>Onigawara
"¡DAMN IT!"

But he doesn't even get to take a single step before...

BOOOOOM
Slash

The impact is violent like none you've ever given before. The explosion of air sends your partner flying so far that he disappears, along with the trees that collapse a kilometer around. For better, there was a cut at the end, after the impact, your turbo bat advanced thanks to its exaggerated blade, and cut the kunoichi from the head to the groin, opening a wound that would need stitches just to dress.

Everything is dust. Everything is earth. When this dissipates, Kaguya has already risen, with her body somewhat bent down due to weakness... But she was touching her stomach, which was only part of the wound she had, starting from the forehead.

"Gah..."

She spits some blood, which goes through her ninja mask.

<Kaguya 84% of life

She is also covered in burns. In fact, her hair has a small flame still alive and dancing.

"..."

She is injured. It was a big attack... but still, she still has her eyes closed.

(I have to come up with something...)

She thought. And without more, she shot off to the side to run the kilometer necessary, escaping until where there were trees again, at which point she would jump to the top of one of these and start running by jumping between branches at high speed.

1d120 = 21

While, she puts her sword back into its sheath. She begins to make movements with her hands.

"Buey, mono, liebre, rata, jabalí, pájaro, buey, caballo, pájaro, rata, tigre, perro, tigre, serpiente, buey, carnero, serpiente, jabalí, carnero, rata, mono, pájaro, dragón, pájaro, buey, caballo, carnero, tigre, serpiente, rata, mono, liebre, jabalí, dragón, carnero, rata, buey, mono, pájaro, rata, carnero, pájaro." kek

Everything in less than a second, then says...

"¡JUTSU DE AGUA: JUTSU DRAGÓN DE AGUA!"

1d120 = 76

>>123768
>Trevor

>Haha. Very good, my friend, what do we have here?

"What's up, Rick, check this out, bro..." That's what Trevor would say in the Latin American dub https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X1MT2p5JAsM▾
He pulls out a small rolled-up handkerchief, which he carefully unfurls to reveal something.

"You haven't seen this before..."

He raises a piece of paper.

"Observe: A relic from 1862. Printed right here in the United States, by none other than the Bureau of Engraving and Printing in Washington DC. You can see the credentials right here..."

It was a one-dollar bill.

"And observe..."

He holds the dollar up to the light, revealing intricate images embedded within it.

"100% original..."

He drops it onto the counter so Rick can examine it however he likes.

"What do you think? I'm not asking much for it... Give me a billion and it's yours."

>>3375
>>3374
"Yes siiiiiiiiiiiiii, we're talking Date"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOHuT5njtRA▾
"? Date?"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOHuT5njtRA▾"Date."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOHuT5njtRA▾"¡Date!"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOHuT5njtRA▾"Daaaaaaaaaaaaateeeeeeeeeeeeee"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOHuT5njtRA▾"Da-"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOHuT5njtRA▾"OK FINE, DAMMIT! I want you to kill that fucking cyclops, got it? Or as your people would say... Fuck me, I want you to send that motherfucker straight to Saint Peter... Huh? Know everything about him? Uhhh, let me reeeemember."

No, they don't know.

"You think I'm his boyfriend or some shit to know that bullshit?!"

Not yet... For now.

"Tsk, I only know he's the leader of some crazy taka taka gang, runs a park, literally always wears samurai armor, and walks around with some man-child girl who's got feet like Marcus Fenix from Gears of War. What else, what else? Ah, seems like he talks with hidden intentions and sometimes flirts with you... Ignore that last part. I already told you which head I want, and I already paid you—use the data I gave you and FIND HIM! If you kill him fast, maybe I'll toss you a few extra bills, got it? But anyway, I think we're out for now, 'cause people might get suspicious if they see us talking... If we get caught, I'm calling ICE to deport your ass to Peru—I don't want legal trouble, okay?"

Ironic he says that being half-Mexican.

"See you around, and before I forget, I'll give you my number so you can send me your measurements. I'm gonna get you a jacket made so you can be part of us! I PAID YOU! THAT MAKES YOU BAD BONEEEEEEE!"

He runs off toward the bus stop, yelling that last part to draw attention, making everyone start linking Alexa to the two of them. That way, she'll have no choice but to join their gang... Wait, didn't he want discretion?

...

"Man, I hate to say it, but that's gonna give you scoliosis."

He shakes his head as he hears the nasty crack of his back after stepping out of the restroom and putting it away. He also wonders what the hell a fire hydrant is doing in this spot, but doesn't overthink it—sometimes stuff just happens.

With Kaguya!

He clicks his tongue and looks away, frowning when he dismisses her compliment about being a criminal. This is exactly why he isn't nice to anyone—he hates being looked down on. On the other hand, he laughs at her 676767 joke.

"It's obvious you don't have TikTok..."

He mutters when he sees it didn't amuse her much, if at all. He even makes the hand gesture, showing both hands like "does this ring a bell?" but nothing. The girl is as stiff and serious as her muscles—clearly cautious.

"Die? Wouldn't it be better to say you want a better place to kill me?"

He raises an eyebrow at the odd comment.

<Yeah, such a terrible shame... A meteorite fell on Owen while he was walking down the street.
"OW..."

Well no! Owen mocks how prudish his friend is, pretending his hand speaks Oni's answer—basically first pic, laughing his ass off right in his face while still being respectful. Owen does give him the side-eye, like they say around here, and gives him a full ass analysis—almost shooting laser beams from his eyes! Either way, surrounded by nature, Owen takes a deep breath, filling his lungs with pure air. Man, this place is truly chill.

"I don't care about fairness, babe. I've got no honor, no codes—if I can cheat you, I will. BUT! I don't like being blatantly shown up like a damn idiot."

"Both, yeah, both... I'm both... Je."

Basically, Oni and he perform this scene https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vLRvWey7Cec▾"Destroying is just as important as creating, babe. For new things to exist, the old ones must be destroyed. This forest used to be a beautiful sea in prehistoric times, but surely it was destroyed to become the little grove you love so much. Don't fear or despise destruction—when it arrives, just accept that something better is coming. You know? Destruction can bring hope..."

Philosopher now, the corn-headed freak.

"I see... I don't wanna get involved in your business. I hate people who stick their noses where they don't belong, but wanna know something? Revenge will leave you empty. I'm not saying don't do it—GET REVENGE! But it won't be worth it."

Cracks his neck bone.

"I know. Nobody holds back with me. Nobody has ever held back with me. Ever since I was born, nobody's held back."

Winks.

AND THE FIGHT BEGINS!

"It's not about arriving fast... It's about knowing HOW to arrive!"

Responding to Kaguya's impression when Owen suddenly appears and grabs his flaming bat. Owen gives the ninja zero time—slams the weapon straight into her face with no mercy at all. Now it doesn't matter if she's hot or if she could've been his cure to avoid degeneration. Now only the fight matters. And with that in mind, the meteorites they've become crash violently into the ground.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WFN9tUtrq-s▾
He shakes his hand to get rid of the dust and dirt kicked up, coughs a little but tries not to show it too much—doesn't wanna look weak, making faces like Davo when he avoids yawning with Messi—personal stuff! The point is, a huge grin spreads across his face seeing the wound he gave the ninja. Maybe a bit cruel, but he's glad to start off on the right foot. Never dealt this much damage on his first attack before—makes him happy.

"Don't take it personally."

He comments just a second before Kaguya returns to action. Owen whistles in surprise—he didn't expect her to react so fast after being badly injured, burned, and still on fire. She's tough, and she doesn't waste time. Though oddly, instead of jumping between branches, she sheathes her sword. Wait, isn't this supposed to be a fight? Owen doesn't get it, and gets even more confused when he notices her moving her hands.

"Huh? What the fuck?"

He tries to follow her with his eyes but she's too fast. It's hard.

"Is your attack gonna kill me from boredom with Animal Planet explanations?!"

He grumbles.

"Let's hope this isn't like Naruto..."

He mutters to himself and stops bothering to look for Kaguya. Lowers his gaze to the ground and starts randomly picking up stones while she recites the entire animal encyclopedia. Once he's got a good amount, he quickly hurls them into the air and, with his bat wrapped in flames, begins batting each stone midair—without even looking at Kaguya. Pure instinct. If he could prove he's better than Home Run, and that softball is a superior discipline to baseball, then he'll trust his sixth sense to hit Kaguya. Of course, he attacks precisely when she uses her jutsu, so their attacks will likely collide. And so his fire won't be extinguished by her water, Owen instantly boosts his speed to level 3—turning his flames blue—to increase the chances that his stones will vaporize whatever she throws at him and still hit that cute girl's body.

1d110 = 30

1d110 = 84

>>3377
>>3374
I use my only reroll! P-For it not to waste the speed...

1d110 = 17

1d110 = 87

>>3372
Mariana suggests verse once again. But... Like this.

>Mariana
Little bird
"Uuuhh~"

A flustered Mariana grumbles and quickly turns around again to escape from this situation once and for all.

>Mariana
"¡Oysh!, ¡Already, goodbye, I'm leaving, adiós!"

She makes fists and gives little punches. Your words are received by the wind, and the little bird from before passes by again to spread more gossip.

>Little bird
"Uuhh~"

Releases before disappearing into the horizon to mess with some other duo. With nothing to do in the solitude but looking at pumpkins, you proceed to leave and wander around until eventually you arrive at the mall.

...

And eventually you arrive. The power of the ellipsis is great. The line, however, has no shortcuts. The old man forces you to witness a boring scene until he is dragged away from the scene, allowing you finally to buy three little things. You should have switched lines at that time, but that's life. They charge you, you pay, you thank them...

>Cashier nigga
Oracle
<¡C.O.M.M.I.E!

"In reality my ideas align more with an anarchist vision..."

<Good attempt. Your subversive ideas will affect weak minds, but NOT ME, my parents embraced me.

"Plural? I understood you live with a single mother, little one."

That doesn't change your plans. You rip out the monitor, separating it from the mechanical arm that carried it through the air, cutting connections with a buzzing and several sparks. You take the now tablet under your arm determined to change its ideals from the root.

<I will show you the wonders of capitalism, Oracle

"Oh, you'll see those yourself."

This time, the damages would be your responsibility. You feel your pockets lighten until they are filled with nothing but air,

<Current money: $0

"...it's a $500 monitor."

<Current money: -$460

"It will be deducted from your next payment."

I said it couldn't be owed, and usually it's true, but you found a way by directly damaging the property of the association without it being collateral kek

This turns out to be a blow to your plans. Now you couldn't just buy competitors, but you owed money to the association... The coconuts didn't look like a bad option now. I almost feel like a memedictator now. My intention was indeed to carry out the other scene, but in the end, I didn't like it. So... That. Sorry. But you can save that 95 dice and use it later, while it's in this thread keksito

1/2 for convenience

>>3372
>Oracle
"Good. This will be your first step to escape from the matrix. Go to Charia beach. There you will be given the instructions-" -the screen turns off definitively-

With no other options to get quick money, it was time to visit the beach. It's worth noting that Charia is a state where it usually gets quite cold and snows regularly, it's something characteristic of its climate. Today was no exception, although it was sunny... but whatever.

>☆☆☆loading...☆☆☆

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6eanxSWdY_E▾
Pro tip: go to the gym to increase your stats

>☆☆☆load complete☆☆☆

You arrive at the place, in front of you there is a small lemonade stand a few meters from the beach, which was going down stone stairs.

Now doubts arise: How the hell is there a beach? Charia doesn't face the sea... Well, the beach body slam is an artificial beach near the river body slam, just add sand! The lagoon looks fresh and crystal clear. It would be perfect for swimming, but there's not a soul around due to the low temperatures, even if the sky is only partially cloudy. The Halloween decoration here makes it seem like there's little festive spirit, the beach sand has pumpkins made of sand and little else. At least there are several palm trees decorated with lights, and, again, pumpkins carved at their base. It seems there was an overpopulation of pumpkins this year.

Anyway, the stand. The person attending is the one you will work with, when you meet him... It's... Well, a television with wheels.

>Oracle
"Psst... It's me. The oracle. Come closer..." -you do- "Do you see those palm trees over there?" -it doesn't have hands to point at you, and this time not even the single eye it had in the employment center, but when you look, you don't find any others than the palm trees- "the government... the dirty government of shit monopolizes them. Those trees... They aren't just any palm trees. Inside they have SUPER COCOS. It's scientifically proven that super coconuts are like a red pill... They wake you up. But this people... oh, this people don't want us to get them... no. Because the government wants you as a walking dead, an idiot who doesn't question anything, who doesn't drink super coconuts... And that's where you come in. Do you understand?"

Maybe yes, maybe no. It's probably that I should go into details and for good reason, just continue with your ramblings.

"Listen to me, and listen well, girl. With my governmental neuromodulator of aluminum I can open a small gap in the system that inverts the polarity of the monopoly and, basically, for people who haven't woken up yet like you: it will allow, within a time limit, to open 5 coconut trees and get super coconuts. Oh yes..."

Opening coconut trees...

"Super coconuts are different from normal coconuts. They grow INSIDE the palm tree... And they are scarce. You have to choose the 5 you like the most. Hopefully you'll get more than one..."

"Now go! I already activated my thing I mentioned!"

>Super Coconut Collector
-rolls 5 dice 2
-each die counts as a tree cut
-if you roll die 1, the coconut tree gives you a super coconut
-if you roll die 2, the coconut tree gives you two super coconuts
-3
-2
-1
-START!

If you want to speed up by redoing this job, just say you want to retry and roll another set of 5 dice 2 kek. There's no penalty for retrying, you keep the money from both rolls.

>>3383
>Cat
For his very good luck, he found that the idiots above had equipped firefighting gear. It's the least they could do. Cat opened the case and took the tool. Compared to his axe, which is at home, this one is bigger and heavier; the butt ends in a point, but it's more similar to a hoe than a miner's pick, not to mention the red details.

>Firefighter Axe (Equipped)

----Let's end this crap.----There's no turning back; Cat takes the stairs and climbs toward the ceiling of the room. After arriving, he confirms that his employer is already there, along with a helicopter. Instinctively he raises the axe and positions it on his shoulder. Cat remained still, observing; sighed defeated, and began to approach the iron beast.

"Let's end this" is the only thought that is in his mind.

>>3376
didn't accept to shake his hand...
>Rick
Chomlí
"Wow"

You take the piece of paper, at first glance... it's just a dollar. But it depends on who presents it, or who sells it.

>Rick
Chomlí
"I don't know, Rick..."

>Rick
Chomlí
"Let's see, can I borrow it?"

>Rick
"Sure friend, go ahead."

He hands over the bill, unlike Rick, Chomlí observes it from afar, holding it out as far as his hands could reach while squinting at it.

>Chomlí
"Yes... And here we have George Washington... Do you know who George Washington is?" -he asks, looking up- "he was famous for being the first president of the United States... They elected him because they saw him as a leader worthy of following and a hero... at that time the election was unanimous."

He places the bill on the counter, leaving it up for grabs.

>Rick
"And... how much are you asking for it?"

Chomlí
"Heavens..."

>Rick
"Yes... And also that I'm not going to pay a billion. Hahaha"

"But... your explanation was funny. Let me call an expert to check it out. Maybe he can give us a second opinion."

After saying that, Rick runs out of the place to go to the back of the pawn shop.

>Rick (confessional)
"I'm not going to pay a billion! But just in case... I'll call Mark. He knows everything about American history. If we can get something out of it... he'll tell us. Hehehe."

>Chomlí
"And... do you like Star Wars?"

After that, Rick walks through the door behind Chom, returning to the place as if nothing happened.

>Rick
"Okay, friend... sorry for making you wait. A national history expert will be here shortly to tell us how much this is really worth."

An old man enters through the main door. Bearded, wearing glasses and a large hat that looks Amish.

>Rick (confessional)
"I want that dollar in my store... I mean, he wants to sell it for a reason... but a billion dollars? Pf... I could go bankrupt."
>Mark
"Hi, Rick. How are you?"

>Rick
"Jaja... you made it, buddy. Let's see, Chom?"

>Chomlí
"Uh... Yeah, we want you to check out this dollar..."

Mark steps forward and takes it.

>Mark
"Let me take a look..." –he inspects it closely, his eyes widening– "ohhh money, money, money..." –he says with intense interest, sounding just like Mr. Krabs–

>Rick
"See anything interesting?"

>Mark
"You bet I do, Rick... Look at this."

He places the bill on the counter and points to a specific spot for all to see. There's an asterisk in the print.

>Rick
"Alright... What are we looking at?"

>Chomlí
"An asterisk..."

>Mark
"That's right, but not just any asterisk. This is a one-dollar bill of what we call a 'star note,' named precisely for that asterisk at the end of its serial number. These bills were reprinted by the Bureau in the 80s to replace damaged or misprinted bills before circulation. And this one is particularly rare because it's from series A, 1981. In this condition, so well preserved... it's very uncommon."

>Chomlí
"Whoaaaa."

>Rick
"And how much do you think it's worth?"

>Mark
"Well, Rick. You know I always say history is priceless... There's no price on history fuark but... typically notes from this series are valued between... $500 and $1,000."

>Rick
"Alright! Thanks a lot, Mark."

He shakes his hand.

>Mark
"You're welcome, Rick."

He says, and leaves, once again leaving them in the price negotiation battle.

https://youtu.be/HK2VLhbSaoc?si=eYJRZ3LUWyGXptYB▾
>Rick
"Alright... with this new info... I can offer you $100."

$100?!

"I know he said $500, but pal... I gotta make a profit. How many people do you think are out there looking for a bill with a star in its serial number? It could sit in my store for muuuuuch too long before finding a buyer. I gotta make something."

>Was: $1,000,000,000,000
>Now: $100

>>3377
The weather was weird.

>Alexa
"...you." -she finishes saying it for you-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOHuT5njtRA▾
Onigawara
"Did she just laugh?" -he doesn't believe it-

>Alexa
"Yeah, damn it. What, you think I don't laugh?"

But you didn't have any more data. Maybe her last name because she told you, that was Masamune. Other than that, you were clueless.

Alexa
"Well, good, because I'm not a detective, man."

Onigawara
Alexa
"Hey, listen to me! I don't want a damn fucking jacket!, HEY!" -they were already far away- "couple of losers..."

>[Alexa's number added to your phone] make a group chat kek Aldo, self-reminder. Alexa's measurements: 62–57–67

...

Kaguya, the ninja who lives meditating in the forest, doesn't have TikTok. Her lifestyle deprives her of wonderful things like tung tung sahur or the 6 7, which she doesn't recognize even with the iconic emote you send her for her to get it.

>Kaguya
Onigawara
"Ah... She must be one of those anti-iPad types..."

>Kaguya
"...iPad...?" -change it to anti-technology-

Kaguya doesn't respond to your question. She stays, like a good place to die, and the silence keeps her until the next stop. Meanwhile, you have an argument with your buddy over his ridiculous principles, reducing his words to those of a simple, stupid puppet hand, to which, of course, he responds with annoyance.

>Onigawara
"Pfft... Idiot..."

He misses it, you can see without problems and without protests from the girl, that beautiful figure that is drawn in detail on her posterior when she walks. In her gait, you find hints of firmness that let your imagination run wild, the curves were large in proportion to her small body, she was well-formed. Like her whole muscular body, she radiated a certain strength, but she combined the just amount of softness expected from a good ass. It's Schrodinger's ass, firm and soft until grabbing it tells you what its true nature is.

But sadly, that might never happen due to the circumstances in which you crossed paths. Now you face each other, preparing weapons for the lethal encounter.

>Kaguya
Onigawara
Kaguya
"Maybe you're right... but criminals destroy senselessly... and you don't seem any different."

<Do you want to know something? Revenge will leave you empty, I'm not saying don't do it! Get revenge! But it won't be worth it.

"I don't seek personal satisfaction. It's my purpose..."

It's all she responds, perhaps ending up agreeing with you unintentionally. If it's her only purpose, what will be left of her once it's fulfilled?

<I know, no one holds back with me, no one has ever held back with me, since I was born no one held back with me.

"Then, I hope you're prepared..."

1/2

It makes me laugh how sexualized Ibuki is in fanart ayy

>>3377
The first attack is violent, the fall is precipitous, and the damage is considerable. But Kaguya is quick to recover and move; by the time you speak to her, she has already decided on her next move. She lunges to her side and flees at full speed towards where the forest still stands. You follow I guess kekcito closely, re-entering the forest as she forms hand seals at high speed.

Gathering your ammunition, you prepared for whatever was to come: rocks. It's hard to imagine a simpler thing, but in your hands, they are stronger than any firearm ever created. You grab the stones you can and drop them; before your perception, they seem to freeze completely in the air, lined up and ready to be batted as you pray for one thing.

Kaguya
"WATER STYLE: WATER DRAGON JUTSU!"

In front of her, born from the very air, a gigantic Chinese dragon made entirely of water materializes. As thick as redwood trunks, the beast coils in a beautiful maneuver, showcasing its ostentatious colossal figure before shooting towards you. Its flight is swift and fierce; the air hisses and strips leaves from every tree as it focuses on you.

A fall into water from so many meters would be concrete for a normal person. Now, what if water crushed you at hypersonic speeds? That wouldn't be pretty. Your bat shines brighter with every movement of your wrist; in a second, the dazzling blue fire surrounding the incandescent bat and the deafening roars of the engine indicate maximum power. You almost feel it slip from your hands on its own due to the sudden power surge, but you control it with your massive arms, aim at the perfectly aligned stones before you, and throw a double swing that propels them at maximum power.

The stones catch fire, becoming miniature blue comets that collide with the dragon at dizzying speeds. The temperature rises throughout the forest as the dragon's entire structure fills with bubbles showing its boiling, and in a millisecond, it combusts.
BOOOOOM

The water contains most of the explosion, but still, surrounding trees fall as if nothing. Meanwhile, you are surprised, before even one of the water drops moves an inch, you saw Kaguya shoot out from the suspended rain in a diagonal fall wielding her small sword once more. She used the water dragon as a distraction!

Draws. Fast. Falls behind you... As if she had done nothing... Then she sheathes the sword again.

"Ninja style: thousand cuts."

You feel your chest being torn by metal countless times. Your shirt is reduced to shreds, your jacket torn to uselessness, and your chest marked with cuts from end to end.

<Owen: 88%

Everything returns to normal. Hundreds of liters of water fall to the ground, trees collapse from the explosion, and the pain hits you. All at once.... But it wasn't that bad compared to the attack she received. The problem is that now your weapon was unloaded counted as used die

You could change it and wait for its passive reload, or roll a die 2 and reload it die 1: 50% die 2: 100% but that uses a die.

At that, Kaguya turns around, sheathing her sword once more.

"It wasn't enough..."

She mutters as she clasps her hands together. She needs both to perform jutsus.

(I said I'd go all out...)

"Ox, hare, monkey..."

She separates her hands, now in one of them a concentrated lightning bolt seems to form. A ball of pure energy, of... VISIBLE and AUDIBLE CHAKRA dancing in her palm with the nature and speed of real lightning.

"Chidori..." kek

(This will be a killing blow...)

Fulfilling her word of not holding back, she lunges at you, charging her hand with it with the chidori as her only weapon and launching it directly at you.

1d120 = 4

"One, two, three..."

Meanwhile, she does something else. Defying the established -the need for two hands- she makes several movements with her free hand to prepare a new jutsu...

"Shadow clone jutsu!"

1d120 = 4
No, she hasn't opened her eyes yet kek

>>3387
>113
The Uchiha power

>>3388
Don't fuck with me, better pass me how the slot machine thing was to use it now that I'm definitely gonna take a huge L kek.

>>3387
>>3386
>>3390
I answer briefly and very directly to the point to see as soon as possible if I do well in this unavoidable turn, if the next attack of the ass is not +100000 then I will answer the loose ends I left above kuek
"¡PUTA MADRE! ¡SI SERA COMO NARUTO!"

It's the little he can say when he sees the water dragon coming after the jutsu that the girl performed although just like Owen distracted him with a possible forest fire, she does it with that arrogant attack that ends in nothing, or at least not with the dragon since she appears behind his back with her sword being put into its sheath, the criminal turns his gaze to his presence, and with a totally bad surprise, swallows saliva and murmurs...

"I... I saw this is a samurai movie-"

Before commenting that he saw the seven samurais of Akira Kurosawa, he feels something in his chest, a huge pain that culminates in his clothes being totally torn and in a considerably deep wound, a lot of blood shoots out of his chest as if it were a scene from the aforementioned movie, Owen raises his gaze, clenches his teeth, and holds back the pain like the Zoro meme when he felt Luffy's pain ¡Fallo! And he can only console himself that between the damage he did to Kaguya and this, he's still winning him ¡For now! Let's just wait for what's coming ¡But let's not get ahead! Owen's eyes turn white, he gasps and looks a bit lost.

The water falling on his face revives him.

"¡CLARO QUE NO ES SUFICIENTE! ¡NADA ES SUFICIENTE EN MI CONTRA!"

He shouts, a mix of adrenaline, anger and pride makes his heart explode, clearly he was not going to stop it with a wound in his chest, at least they were at hand and that in a certain way satisfies him, what he doesn't like at all is seeing that he once again performs a jutsu ¡A Chidori! Kek Or rather, a damn ball of energy but not a simple ball of energy, an ENORME ball of energy, she is serious, literally putting all her strength into "that".

"This is going to hurt..."

He smiles.

"But let's make it worth it."

Quickly he tries to reload his bat.

1d2 = 2

Then he faces the girl without fear when she charges at him with fury, he doesn't move, he doesn't get nervous, it's like he accepts the attack with all the pleasure in the world or like he knows that defending himself would be a lost cause, instead, he activates his ability of the slot machine, he remembers his drunk master's advice and closes his eyes, takes a breath and does a small meditation in the middle of the fight, he sees pulling the lever to activate his ability and depending on what comes out, fortunately or maybe not, the other jutsu of the girl looks weak or with lack of attention, he supposes that it's not necessary to dodge it either and I suppose I can't because I need a turn without doing anything to activate the slot machine if I'm not mistaken jsjsjs so he lets his mind flow to see if with that he can get a good result, the damage is guaranteed, better take advantage of it.

1d3 = 2

1d3 = 3

1d3 = 3

I understand, I understand, so I imagine I can only freeze when I have two the same and one different ¿Right? From there on I don't know if I would have infinite shots if that happens, you didn't specify so I will take advantage

>>3391
>>3390
And they pull out three different ones, how much of a bastard...

>>3394
>>3393
Notice that I liked the original method because if you felt like you were throwing darts at a slot machine and in slot machines you get screwed if luck isn't on your side but let's try this one during this fight and see which one works better, the improvement you added to freeze numbers I liked just as much, let it stay if in case we end up keeping the original or maybe we should stop playing with the darts and keep this fixed ayyyy

1d100 = 66

>>3386
fun fact, Alex was a Tottenham fan that jobber team that never won shit until last season, so yeah, I'm saying this because I saw Alexa, not sure if you care or whatever...

>>3380
"Actually my ideas align more with an anarchist view..."

"That's what a communist would say..."

He furrows his eyes, his heart swells opposite to his gaze.

"Plural? I thought you lived with a single mother, little one."

He corporalizes a tushe with the help of a gaspeo. A very high finger and damage to private property were going to protest, when reconsidering, he stopped. He had a point.

"My dad left thirteen years ago on a business trip, n-no I don't know what you're talking about Oloraculo"

That's new and nothing pleasant. He masturbates a prostate-like insecurity.

>>>Work!

If you were in Rome, do as you see. And if the wallet cries, learn the art of chores.

In bankruptcy, renounce your scarce arrogance to surrender to the arms of a commie and his poorly paid work... a second, poorly paid?

It's a thousand dollars to collect some dirty coconuts, thinking twice, the common denominator doesn't earn that even in two full pay periods. Not even in ten months of allowance would you save that rate.

That's it.

Checkmate Oloraculo. She is the one really scamming the system, nothing, I repeat nothing, can defeat omnipresent capitalism.

Inside they have SUPER COCOS. It's scientifically proven that super coconuts are like a red pill... They wake you up. But this people... oh, this people don't want us to get them... no. Because the government wants you as a walking dead, an idiot who questions nothing, who doesn't drink super coconuts... And that's where you come in. Do you understand?"

"Aja... Super coconuts, sounds like the premium category of a gay page" He gives himself a loud facepalm "What stupidity, you're a communist, of course you're gay" He gestures with hands as if holding pistols and coquettishly points at him from the height of the hip, eyeing with a wink "Do you want to be my gay friend? I've always wanted one of those, you remember Reese Witherspoon's movies? Like in those? Or did you legally dye your hair blonde? Well, like that"

They were the most vacuous reasons in the world to objectify a person by their gender.

>>>

The man has five senses and for each of them a thousand pleasures and for each pleasure a hundred arts.

Toil and sweat, does not reside in that hundred.

>>3381
On count of three he adjusts the gi, aligns the hips and releases the hand's chant. The air is cut into slices. The first trunk is sliced in half with a vegetal moan, the others follow, chopped in cascade before falling in line to the ground. With an arch and unarch of the hand he cuts down almost a dozen palms.

KIAI~

He performs a reverent bow with samurai courtesy and eviscerates at random. As if peeling an orange, he plunges his fingers into the rind and opens it up, performing a cesarean. From the white hole of a coconut he drinks a raw sip. So much chatter from the Oracle had left her thirsty for something real.

"Are you not already big enough to be a communist? Think about it Oloraculo, you're still in time to join the winning side and break your back fourteen hours a day so that someone else can buy a yacht in Miami"

Another argument stuffed with politics, another teenager with inflation of being her own boss.

He twists the fruit on its entire axis. A few drops of nectar moistened his tongue, but after that, no matter how he shook the fruit, nothing came out. With the thirst intact and the hunger for money still alive, he picked up a chop of karate and slashed a solitary cut into the air.

1d2 = 1
1d2 = 1
1d2 = 1
1d2 = 1
1d2 = 2

No worry OPato, the autistic one was mine and as I said I like coconuts the same way kek Sorry for the delay, I'll be more loaded with work for a while

>>3382
>>3383
>>3384
Small gestures are enough to go very far. A compliment and a caress win you the sweetest smile you've ever seen your cousin form. Things were already much better, at least between the two of you. The new normal isn't so easy to accept, but under the gray morning, the mundane walk is, all in all, calm. Your little cousin wanders, almost becoming background noise to what you dissociate. A worrying possibility is what must return you to the present.

>Carla
Carla. Lovemeter: 95%
>Queen of the crows upgrade!
-now you can ask the crows for help without Carla as an intermediary

Today, for festive reasons, School Z is a shadow of what it once was. The gate that greets you is one of such funereal black as its design, its metal bordered by walls made of dusty, poorly stacked ancient-looking stones and covered in moss, reminding one more of a cemetery than a school.

You get out of the car, at the entrance, a duo of police officers in their typical blue uniforms are talking to a teacher. Yes, it had worked.

Crossing the gate and finding yourself on the usual stone path, you notice this too has been affected. The tiles are displaced like a Peruvian ruin, some cobblestones are missing and many others feel flimsy when you step on them. The path is far from the luxury that the student here is used to.

All around you, police officers observe you as they patrol the courtyard in the distance... And carved pumpkins glowing with their own light from the candles protected in their mouths. The number of pumpkins is nameless, they extend as far as the stone path you walk, as if trying to distract from the vegetation that was once so well cared for and is now dead. The gardeners' diligence went to waste, for the bushes are now dry as if from the desert, and the cherry trees are stripped of leaves and darkened until they look like charcoal. They are nothing more than a place for the abundant crows to rest now.
The fountain halfway there doesn't go against the trend. Now cracked as if eons had struck it in a single day, and covered with the only vegetation on campus. Brush that claimed its place next to the only source of visible liquid... A red liquid, gushing from the fountain simulating blood.

Finally, you break through the French doors of the school. Inside, well, more of the same.

https://youtu.be/tsPdVsIXqzU?si=xjQOlx7Qq9p3uzeI▾
The principal allowed herself to play Halloween music. The interior was decorated from end to end, lockers turned into various monsters, hallways being traversed by costumes of all colors, the ceiling almost touched by ghost drones laughing during their flight... it was the most festive sight.

But your horror wouldn't come from a chupacabra or the Black Lagoon monster. But from realizing your bare hands. With your thought as fast as you, you walk to the fire equipment and, as it's an emergency case, you break the glass, taking the weapon.

>Zombie kid
"Hmm... The glow?"

He asks upon seeing you. You have no time, you take the stairs and go up to the roof with determination. You open the door, and the breeze from the heights blows on your face... there's someone else there, not who you expected.

He turns with curiosity, not with emotion. He has a very fluffy tail like a squirrel, of a red so intense as his hair. His costume? Yuuji Itadori from Jujutsu Kaisen. She? Smoking a cigarette of terrible quality... If you tried to remember, you could recall that this girl is from your class.

Otherwise... it's true. It was supposed to be this after classes. The squirrel gives a slow blink, takes a hand from his pocket and extends it to you. He was holding a pack of Pyramid cigarettes, the worst in history. Without saying anything, he offers you one, which sticks out.

We'd have to kill time...

Implying that you accept keksito you can also refuse, smoke one of yours or whatever. You don't have to do exactly the following for the timeskip, it's just for the reference
The cigarette touches your lips and, without changing her exhausted expression, she lights it for you.

https://youtu.be/y8VfziFZMGY?si=pCd8lnAEYHmOOMyK&t=1m12s▾
It's horrible, worse than the times you chewed the Lucky Strike directly. A more disgusting chemical taste and a heavy sensation with every inhale. It would be healthier to smoke a battery...

But it helps pass the time. The clock flies like the smoke from the pyramid, lost in the dizzying wind before the wind grows stronger, announcing the arrival of the helicopter that finally descends to use the roof as a helipad. Luisa watches this with slight confusion as you finally head toward the red bégimo with giant propellers on its casing. Its doors open for you, and you enter.

Inside, a fat pilot greets you.

>Pilot
"WELCOME TO GABATO AIRLINES!, Are you ready?, Because here we goooo!"

He doesn't wait for an answer. The helicopter lifts off the ground. With a button press, Gabato activates the propellers, which turn an incandescent red before spitting fire and accelerating the helicopter with a sonic boom before vanishing into the horizon.

>Luisa
"..."

She drops her cigarette and stomps on it. Turning around, she raises her hand, waving goodbye to the cloudy sky.

>☆☆☆loading...☆☆☆

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6eanxSWdY_E▾
Pro tip: Bring some food to heal during battles!

>☆☆☆load complete☆☆☆

https://youtu.be/BWY_eSrtXX0?si=zAroHcXN3K35nQWL▾
While Gabato suffered from the hypersonic speed, you could enjoy the view. You watched the country change with the kilometers, mutating from a great metropolis to vast pr stretching as far as the eye could see. Isolated hills here and there, and the sky, blue here, as vast as the prairies themselves.

South Dakota... Pretty, but nah, you weren't here for tourism, but to kill a fool.

"AAAAAAHHHHHH! Ah, we've arrived."

He cuts the propellers, and through the pilot's window, you spot the famous monument of the four greatest presidents of the country as the helicopter begins to descend.
Touch down, and shortly after, so do you. You're still quite a distance from the monument; in the distance, stone arches mark the entrance to the Flag Walk. But then, your phone rings.

https://youtu.be/gCdmVZ2eQEA?si=ynZyCFOYHG4BUP2r▾
If you answer, you'd hear a familiar voice. Your agent's.

>Chris
"You've arrived at the meeting place."

"Your enemy is number 6. The favorite number of hell."

"Appropriate. If you win, you become a bigger monster... if you lose, you go to hell."

"Try not to die."

"Remember to do everything you need to do before the fight. Go to the bathroom. Prepare your weapon. Use your skills."

"And when you're ready... Follow the Flag Walk. And head to the Garden of Madness."

Click. It was time to prepare.

>Final preparation:
There's a portable luxury bathroom right in front of you.
-Bathroom: save
You can do whatever you want; if Catherine saves herself by taking a shower, it can be kek

Weapon:
What weapon will you start the fight with?

<Fire axe: big, sturdy, and looks awesome. Enough to give you a small dice bonus.
-+5 to your base die (roll 105 with this weapon) you really need at least a small upgrade for this fight, so I'm giving you that, keksito
-no battery disadvantages

<Cracked brass knuckles: tools that boost your punches.
-base die (100)
-no battery disadvantages
-narratively weaker than your axe with lower base damage

Special Skills:

-Ephiga~: strike an idol pose and say this phrase, roll a 2d6. If you roll a 2 and your enemy feels any attraction toward women, they're stunned for one turn (only works once per fight).
(Useless during preparation)

-Queen of Crows (Level 2): roll a 5d6 and choose one of the following item types:
*food/medicine: consumable items to heal
*money: some cash to spend
*random item: an object that doesn't fall into either of the other two categories.
Item quality depends on the roll.

1/2

>>3384
After finishing the preparations, there was only one way forward. You stepped over the threshold of the great stone arch and entered the Promenade of Flags. It was empty; the association had ensured no soul would interrupt the upcoming fight.

Patriotism all around you. 51 flags, one for each state, accompanied you along the mile of uncertainty to the vantage point where you would find your fate.

NUMBER 6: HEROINE
"I'll put an end to crime!"

https://youtu.be/zuTM3sgq-cA?si=fdVVw5V_ioAVfREO▾
At the cliff's edge, eyes fixed high on the mountain faces, you found a smiling young girl showing respect, hand to her forehead in a military salute...

She looked like she'd just left class, still in her typical uniform of shirt, tie, and skirt. If she weren't the only person around, you might have doubted it... but it's her, this smiling brown-skinned girl is Maya Smith... or as she calls herself: Heroine.

>Maya
"Ahh... The United States. Our beautiful country!" -she says, finishing the salute-

She faces you, offering a smile as friendly as can be, as if the two of you weren't about to try to kill each other for the entertainment of the entire country in a moment.

"You must be number 7, right?" -she lets out a little giggle- "I didn't expect to be challenged so soon..." -she says, scratching her cheek with a little finger- "but well..."

She turns her back to you again. It would be easy to betray her like that and drive the axe into her back... or her head. However, she looks utterly relaxed... she takes a deep breath and exhales with relief.

"Ahh... Don't you love this... uh...?" -she looks at you- "Sorry, what's your name?"

Then she looks forward again.

"Our founding fathers are watching us... It makes me feel full of nationalist energy! Haha" -she laughs cheerfully- "The things happening in the country... make me feel very bad..."

She's referring to the worrying rise in crime lately. Violence is the daily bread, and terror the normalcy for the common citizen. Many don't dare to go out at night for fear.

She turns and faces you with determination, clenching her fist in a vow to herself.

"That's why I got into this! I plan to reach first place and make these silly fights end. The number one has the power to decide!"

Really...?

Her mission is noble. But the problem was that you were in her way... and she was in yours. She lowers her fist.

"You didn't attack me during all this time I gave you my back..." -she says with a certain regret, the idea seems to sadden her- "..."

Maybe in another life they would have been friends. But today...

"I think I'm ready."

She takes a staff that was leaning against the railing that marks the drop. Her weapon is a simple bo, non-lethal. Very versatile, demonstrated by the way she twirls it as if it were a parade baton.

"...don't be afraid to hurt me." -she says, then frowns- "If you hesitate... I'll get mad at you!"

Maya Smith (Heroine): HP 110%

Die: 120

Maya waits for your move, determined to start simply by blocking to understand your intentions.

1d120 = 33

I won't reply anymore today, but as I said, starting tomorrow I stop working so I'll be able to dedicate more time to roleplay. Yeepi! So that's it. Turns tomorrow.

>>3391
>I'll answer the loose ends I left above kuek
No need, you can just close that and focus on the movie, unless you're still interested in any previous scenes. In which case, go ahead and I'll answer everything.

>>3395
I like it too, but the activation method is very fucked and I wanted it to work at least once before the role ends keksito.

>let's see which one works better for us
Seconded.

>Animal Spirit
Ayy. Well, help. Although I was expecting at least the dark mode to do saiyan vs ninja kek

>>3396
I noticed that your post from yesterday didn't show up on the main page keksito

>Alex was a Tottenham fan
Baseadisimo, nice team.

>never won shit until last season
It was Kane's curse, they won right after he left keksito

>yeah, I'm saying it because I saw Alexa, not sure if you care or whatever...
Well yes, because now Alexa is a Tottenham fan. In fact, I feel it fits really well among the teams that were available to choose from ayy

>>3397
>No worry OPato, the autistic outburst was mine
Okis, just please don't get discouraged. Keep roleplaying your way. I'm not trying to block you, until the moment you put the hamster it was perfect. Just give me a little space to contribute and keep the scenes for both of us. Sorry if I seem annoying, you know I love you the same way the coconuts kek
Ah well, kuek is respected

>Sorry for the delay, I'll be super busy with work for a while
No need to apologize my amol. I already told you, take all the time you want. Just today I won't send turns.
>Aldo
I'm free and you take care ayy

>>123968
>Hmm 50/50, no crackhead has shot or stabbed me yet for five bucks, so he probably still thinks he can die from those things

Kuek. Will the bullets be stronger than falling like a meteor on your head and breaking your spine?

Aldo... Now that you mention it, it's curious how he just fought MAN. One of the few without a signature weapon.

>What are they doing? Bench pressing a building? Kek

Something like that... When you go you'll see.

>Not sure if it's worth it if you don't like the autism type Baki

I like Baki, I mean, I like that specific anime. I'm not saying Kengan disgusts me, if I haven't seen it it's just because of the ugly cgi animation they gave it keksito. And if I haven't read it it's because I'm not a manga reader and that's it. I'll give that holyland a chance when I get the opportunity.

>if you're more into books I recommend this one:

I could say, I read every now and then. I wouldn't say I'm a super reader... quite the opposite even kek. But yes I read.
In fact, I recently read The Old Man and the Sea... It was okay, but I didn't get why it was considered so damn top.

>I liked it, even though I hate westerns kek

Okay. I'll take a look as soon as I can.

>sorry to interrupt...
It's goooood. Mwa.

>luckily I've been clean from that shit for quite a while kek

Don't relapse, invest your time in better games... Like No More Heroes kek

>I remember back then you were debating style>substance and vice versa, did you reach a conclusion, negroide?

I don't know kek. Mostly I do what I think will be fun. In this case, for me this RP is pure style. Because that's the essence of No More Heroes, there's a narrative and all, but the thing is presenting it all super cool with flags and fireworks.

>To me, most of 2022 passed to a better life, I think almost none of the ones I knew from that year are still alive

Nah... Cuervo was Swarm I'm saying this only because he literally admitted it in that RP kek and even though I'm not good at deducing, I think I know who Mosquito is kek. The thing is whether they'd be willing to come back. Too much time has passed since then.

>d-doesn't he?

Well-

>Ignorance is bliss, ushcale ushcale kek
Keksito. Yeah, better it stays a mystery.

>>No mommypeia
Hot but you'll end up below, anoncito
>>No padresweet
"Huh?!", wait. No. Sweet seems more like a cool bro friend, not for that kind of stuff, bold kek

>OPedro... kek
There are no laws against kaijins!, Muajaja

>Speaking of that, do the angelics have a dad or was it the immaculate conception style? Or does Marilena eat them like mantises, I don't know Kek
Bees and little birds. In this universe Marilena did have her babies kek

>OP that's literally love power kekaso

Well, it's a GOOD trope. And you're gonna love the POWERUPS from friendship.

>So like rizzing... gives you powers?
Not ironically, yes.

>I don't know why that character archetype always works kek

Kek. Seconded. I'll never forgive Popopoka for going back to the blind girl, you fucking

>What, this RP wasn't singleplayer?
I'm weak, okay? Keksito. I couldn't say no to my Robin or Catherine. Or to Owen, who just revived for this, ayy. And Trevor was already there, I basically opened the RP for him. You joined because I'd already made 7 monkeys, that other guy trolled me and Viceroy was too sexy. Not a joke kek. It was a big part of the reason I gave you the pass before knowing it was you I'm too weak against lolis...

>What are four people doing in this dump? Kek
"Huh? Dump?!" If you don't like it, here's the door! points to a hole in the wall covered by a curtain
Kek

>Are you sure this isn't a ponzi scheme, OPato?
Shh... Don't question it. You just pay kek

>>3404
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4VTBMznLrWs▾

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bAgmGZ9iQ2Y▾

---Mierda.----Penso.

FINALLY I'M FREEEEE!
Now... To roll.
>>3404
Keeek
I let you reroll because you're supposed to roll 105 with that new axe as I told you.

>>3391
It's never enough for you, Natalia Lafourcade! These cuts were just a scratch for number 7! You exclaim with ferocity, but the serene ninja doesn't lose her composure. She knows she must go all out, so she prepares a deadly technique... THE CHIDORI.

With lightning in hand, she launches herself at you at maximum speed. You anticipate the torment. And when it becomes inevitable, you relax and enjoy it. You pull out your weapon, completely discharged and useless, and wave it in front of you as if you were
The blow pierced your chest explosively. Your muscular pecs burst open completely to make room in your chest for the killing strike. The Chidori destroys whoever receives it internally; the impact made your heart explode because of your love and you who think that's very normal along with your lungs and ribcage, while simultaneously opening a hole the size of a plate in your torso. It's not an external illusion; the damage doesn't disperse in any way, you tanked it completely... without showing the slightest sign of pain.

<Owen 48% that's why the super gym is important, if you improved your vitality now you'd have 58 kek

"...?" -sweat drips down his forehead-

(He resisted it... He didn't even flinch!)

And then...

https://youtu.be/n9h7hU6_VI4?si=5iaZT_coFSyuJGe9▾
"!"

Kaguya trembled as if she'd seen death in person. She leaped desperately backward with all her strength just as you opened your eyes, now tinted yellow around your penetrating pupils.

"What is this?!"

You're surrounded by a layer of stone, just as a clone of Kaguya appears behind you to prove she did right by distancing herself. Her fist connects with the rock coating you, and in a second it's completely petrified. Falling to the ground like some strange statue.

"..."

She didn't understand, but she was on guard. Then the stone begins to explode, your arms grow and stretch, covered in thick fur. Your fingers turn into claws sharper than a laser knife, your legs become even more massive and muscular, your head undergoes the metamorphosis too. Your jaws stretch and increase their power like never before in your imagination.

When the stone finally falls, Kaguya can find your eyes again. See what you've become... A 3-meter duck bear man, bloodthirsty with a roar contained in his throat ready to bring down buildings.

"What kind of monster are you...?"

Kaguya searches her ninja bag and pulls out a kusarigama. Also known as a kama with a chain, while with her free hand she prepares a new jutsu... Or rather... The same one from before.

"Shadow Clone Jutsu!"

1d120 = 12

Now in the next post I'll explain the abilities the animal spirit gives you

>>3407
ESPÍRITU ANIMAL OF OWEN EXPLAINED.
Papaoso turns into a real bear.

You have 3 forms to use the animal spirit, interchangeable as you want in combat. There is no penalty for switching from one form to another.

>Bear Part Mode
You get a specific part of the bear. Like its arms, legs or head. It serves more narratively because it doesn't have special powers that you can't get in the second mode kek.

>Man-Bear Mode
You become the missing link between man and bear. Or more precisely THE BEAR KING.
Special abilities.
-super roar: roll a 3-sided die. If it lands on 1 you push your opponent with the power, 2 cancels one of the enemy's dice and 3 stuns the enemy for a turn. It can only be used once per combat.
-petrification: spit a magical ray from your mouth that turns your opponent to stone for a turn if it hits. Normal die, this ability is still imperfect. For the endgame it becomes instant kill kek
-Blood Sucking Bite: you're thirsty for blood. When you bite you recover a bit of health, the amount of health recovered depends on the die.

>Full Bear Mode
You no longer have hands, but you trade that for almost all the previous abilities and a new one.
-Ball: a one-time attack. Turn into a sphere and spin around with everything against the enemy. Use a 150-sided die.
(In Full Bear Mode you can't use petrification because you're not the Bear King, just a super bear)

Die: in any form except when using a mentioned power you use base die +10
That is /roll{1d100+10 (close the brace)
Or if you use the turbo hit at maximum it would be 110 +10
/roll{1d110+10}
And so kek

Questions?

>>3397
Can we not politicize everything? Some would say, and we would reply that we can't. Let's talk about political shit!

>Oracle
Oracle
!FIN!

+¡$1000!

That was the pay you should receive, but there are no ten Benjamin Franklins.

Current money: $540

This couldn't stay like that... You get to retry the job. >>3381

This resets, the fallen coconut trees grow again in a blink and reducing redundancy: manhandling, tithes and you get 9 super coconuts that you deliver to Oracle.

>+¡$900!

>money current: $1440

"Very well... Very well... But... Shh... Listen..." -speaks in a low voice- "this... Is only the first step... Okay...? Now I'll recommend you to the place of paid beatings and listen to this: I'll leave you a special assignment... Keep waking up."

"Ahem. Do you want pro-system lemonade?"

Return to normality. Your job here was done. Never said it better.

>retry job
(Throw another 5 dice to get more money, you keep the one you already have and this is added to it)
>change job
(Try another job)
>quit part-time job
(Leave)

>>3385
I forgot
Imagine if I accepted the hug and said "I'm a fan of you, dude" or something like that
>Trevor

>Can I?

"Sure."

>Ohh... It's a dollar, no doubt about that... Did you know that people actually created money to make trade easier since barter was a very unfair system?

"Amazing..."

>But I don't know if it's more fair jajaja.

"jaja"

The next one is chumli who lifts the bitelle to analyze it as thoroughly as possible.

>Yeah... And here we have George Washington... Do you know who George Washington is?

"Nah."

>He was famous for being the first president of the United States... They chose him because they saw him as a worthy leader to follow and a hero... at that time the election was unanimous.

Uhh, yeah, whatever... He doesn't care much about politics or history.

"I'd beat him one on one..." What does interest him are these baby guns. Raise an arm to flex it in front of the camera.

>Let me call an expert to check it. Maybe he can give us a second opinion.

"Whatever..." This was probably bad for him, but he wasn't in a condition to think too much about it.

Rick leaves, leaving him with chumli.

>And... Do you like Star Wars?

"...." He scratches his chin. "I don't get it..."

"Did dark vader die in star wars 3 because he appears in star wars 6? That's not realistic..." Trevor doesn't understand the concept of a prequel.

--

>Well, friend... sorry for making you wait. Right now an expert in national history will come to tell us how much this really is worth.

As soon as he announces it, a man who recognized watching the program enters through the door.

>Let me see... ohhh money, money, money...
>Do you see anything interesting?
>Yeah, Rick... Look at this.

Trevor also approaches to see what's going on.

>This is a one dollar bill that we call 'starred' precisely because of that asterisk at the end of its serial number (...) And this one is very rare because it's from series A, 1981. In this condition, so well preserved... it's very uncommon.

Damn, really...?

It was supposed to be just a piece of shit bill. What luck.

>And how much do you think it's worth?
>Well, Rick. You know I always say that history is invaluable... There's no price for history

"Hm..."

>Normally, these from this series are valued between... 500 and 1,000 dollars.

"Nice..."

>Alright! Thank you very much, Mark.

The man leaves, and once again they were alone to start the haggling.

>Well... With that new information... I can offer you 100 dollars.

"...." Trevor scratches his chin thoughtfully. He wanted to sell the tension in front of the cameras.

>I know he said 500, but friend... I have to make some money. How many people do you think are looking for a bill with a star in its serial number? It could be in my store muuuuuch longer before finding a buyer. I have to make some money

"I don't think you understand Rick. My sweat and blood are on the line, you know how much grass I had to cut to earn that dollar? Help me out here, old man..."

"For both of us to be satisfied, I'll ask for a price in the middle between 100 and a billion... Give me..." He does a couple of calculations in his head...

"... A million. You lose nothing, and you take the dollar."

>>3401
>It was the curse of Kane, they won as soon as Keksito left
That's why they are >>> Kane

>because now Alexa is a fan of Tottenham
Alexa all premier ends: https://c8.alamy.com/comp/BKC1PA/the-chant-drummer-for-the-fans-and-football-supporters-at-leicester-BKC1PA.jpg

>I feel like it fits very well between the teams to choose
for me it was between Tottenham and Chelsea, because both are posh. but Tottenham is more memeable and interesting kek

>>3409
Two nobodies fighting over nothing, in nowhere, with no one as a witness.

"You don't understand me... I don't like any kind of government. Government is system... and I'm anti-system!"

"Interesting, I'll jot that down on my invisible typewriter."

Types into the air. By the end of the day, the only thing separating communists from anarchists is not showering.

"I could destroy your reality with facts and logic right now."

"I could destroy your reality with facts and nini~" He mimics it perfectly, opening and closing his hand like a puppet. "Update yourself, old man, now we call them 'factos'."

He rests a finger on his chin and lowers his gaze—his joke extrapolates into a spotlight igniting at the peak of his skull.

"For example, did you know that in a quarter of a million years, there's never been an anarchist government? Not primitive, not modern, not a single one."

He stirs the manure, because that's where truth ferments.

"Romantic and sexual relationships of any kind are a method used by the government to exert power over the population and make them consume. Don't be fooled."

She wrinkles her face in an 'eww, weirdo' expression.

"Aishh geez, don't you want me to introduce you to a friend, Oloraculo? Her name's Pippi, maybe she'll help you forget the mental wank of some dude who died like... what? A thousand years ago? America was probably busy killing Brits when that crap was written."

Without consensus, they move into the ring. With a flick of the hand, they splinter tons of wood into thousands of shavings. He coughs up a cloud of sawdust. As the smoke clears, she sees superfrogs rolling at her feet. Instantly, her bony wallet swells into obesity.

Listen to this: I'll give you a special assignment...

"Yeah...?"

She timidly leans her ear toward the screen.

Keep waking up.

"And how... agh!" She grunts, shoving him away and glaring with all the resentment she can muster. "Fine, god, whatever, you win, I'm an anarchist—so what? Do I unlock Matrix powers now? What kind of creepy, all-powerful entity with greasy hands from eating fries would use me as a puppet? Huh? Huh?"

She pinches the bridge of her nose, finding not an ounce of sense in it. If she were in a video game, she'd customize herself as an unstoppable beast trained in a thousand martial arts, not a nearsighted teenage girl.

Without further ado, she prepares for a third and fourth round, two more shoto uchi followed by a flamboyant kiai, clearing trees in a chain. This time she goes gourmet, jamming her finger into the husk of a superfrog, tilting it up, and chugging it down to the bare bottom—she wanted to know if it tasted as bland as its kin.

Regardless of how much she earns, she already has a clear direction. She heads straight to the Tiger Dojo.

>First round:
1d2 = 1
1d2 = 2
1d2 = 1
1d2 = 2
1d2 = 1

>Second round:
1d2 = 1
1d2 = 1
1d2 = 1
1d2 = 2
1d2 = 2

Before leaving, she notices the palm trees sprout back as soon as she cuts them. She rubs her eyes and adjusts her glasses from the frame—no, it's not an optical illusion.

"Can I repeat this as many times as I want...?" She asks Oloraculo, bewildered. "Could I do it until I make a million or something?" It sounds like a video game exploit—she even feels a bit illegal, stealing like this from K-entertainment.

Soon after, she waves goodbye and heads off to the dojo.

>>3410
>>3411
Our PJs have the same pose in these pics
Twin

>>3411
>>3410
I want to be part of the Spark Club!

>>3408
>>3407
"Kaguya..."

She lets out a tiny comment into the air upon seeing the kunoichi's blush while pulling at the hard, wide neck of... Her bat... Anyway, Kaguya approaches with her Chidori and sees Owen in a very indecent pose.

The bat recharges.

Now the slot machine!

A little tune signals the arrival of that ability, and now that I think about it, him closing his eyes while making pelvic and phallic movements with a girl very close by isn't exactly a good combination, aside from looking like a pervert showing his dick to people in parks. Inside his mental world, he can see all the casino hustle, smell its aromas, feel everything around him, and grab the machine that can give a big prize. And yes, he gets a good prize! Three BARs! He expected something more ambitious, but from that to getting nothing and screwing himself over kuek is already a win! A small giggle escapes him, and he only manages to say:

"Not bad."

The presumed slot machine hallucination ends, returning to his slightly disadvantaged position, meaning having a fucking hole in his chest isn't exactly comfortable. And Owen, coming back to himself, sees that scene. Kaguya pierces him without mercy, causing a pain he never thought he'd feel in his fucking life. Literally, his heart explodes for her. Well, if we're talking about love, other organs end up the same way, turned into blood soup.

However, Owen bites his lips, avoiding screaming desperately. He holds back the pain so much that bulging veins appear all over his forehead, as if he were holding back the urge to go to the bathroom. To increase the AURA bet, he starts moving in circles so the girl's arm goes even deeper into him, and the distance becomes so short that she can feel his deep, very hot breath on her beautiful face.

"Is... Is that all?"
She stares fixedly into his hallucinated eyes, getting so close that their foreheads collide and his blood stains her. Suddenly, he grabs her by the arms so she can't back away, forcing her to face him head-on, turning this into a staring contest, a battle of souls, to see which of them has the stronger spirit to be the true Number 6. But the slot machine does its thing, and Owen lets go. That's exactly when his transformation begins... Into a beast...

"AGHHHHHHH."

As if this were the start of Thriller or when Ned Flanders turns into a werewolf, the Number One delinquent starts shaking violently. His eyes glow like a wild animal's, and he begins to be enveloped by a kind of rocky cocoon that turns anything it touches to stone—something that happens to Kaguya's shadow clone... Owen doesn't understand what's happening either. He jerks his head side to side frantically, tearing his own skin and causing more wounds, growling as hair starts sprouting where there was none before. "Did puberty hit him so late?!" No! His nails were sharpening into fucking scalpels, his snout elongating, and his muscles swelling.

He was turning into a bear!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-oQUKvy0cFY▾
A one-eyed Australian would be excited happy to see Owen's furry transformation, but the ninja girl is definitely not happy. She knows what true terror is like Cell, and it's coming in the form of a bear-man pig with a lost gaze, wrapped in a mix of death and destruction. It's as if he'd become a cocaine-addicted bear, but no, it's much worse... Owen roars, roaring with all his might at the kunoichi.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YexQcXnVSzg▾
He drools, sheds tons of fur, growls gutturally, and smells like a wet animal! Well, not that different from human Owen! Anyway, he notices Kaguya preparing to throw something at him, and without wasting time, he propels himself with his hind legs to try and charge the girl, landing two claw swipes before grabbing her hips with his jaws and lifting her up to shake her like a rabbit! He wants to eat her! Unfortunately, not in the way he intended.

He used Bloody Bite!

1d100+10 = 98

>>3402
>>3403
Luisa accompanies you to smoke on the rooftop, both kiss the worst cigarettes on the face of the earth, and let time fly as fast as the helicopter coming for you. You step away from the little squirrel girl, determined to go for the victory.

>Luisa
/elipsis/

Your new opponent worships the country, and promises a future where no American, man, woman, or child, must fear going out at night! That's her vision, and that's why she climbs. Or so you suppose she wants you to believe, behind that friendly smile, or that sorrow for fighting you, lies the characteristic evil of the ranking. It must be so.

She waits for your move, and you make her wait sitting. You approach dragging your weapon across the floor, and as if your strength were transmitted to your weapon through contact, the rock opens by the blade's pass, turning you into the first plow of concrete. The young girl slightly crouches more, ready to go on the defensive the moment it were necessary... But then, you stay still.

>Maya
>124411
>>3415
Keksito. It's incredible how every die was worse than the previous one. But whatever, that. Remember you rolled die 105.

>>3410
As usual, the object brought to the store is subject to inspection and material that inspires a lot of curious data. The image of the president was the striking thing for Chomlí, the father of the country.

>Chomlí
Rick
"Hey, you can't come in with a weapon. iji ji"

A little later, Rick runs off to the confessional. You end up in a one-on-one with Chom, who tries to have some casual conversation about Star Wars, since he's a fan.

>Chomlí
Mark
"And you friend, you're really lucky jejee"

After that, it's time to haggle. The price is updated to 100 miserable dollars, you could earn that by collecting a single super coconut... but nonetheless, you look thoughtful. There's a shot of just your thoughtful expression with suspense music for a moment while Rick tries to convince you with his classic move. You must rebut with intelligence and pity.

>Rick
Now: $1.000.000

Rick opens his eyes wide.

>Chomlí
"Snails... I don't know, Rick..."

>Rick
"Agh... I can't give you that amount... you have to understand me. You know it's excessive..." -sighs- "damn, you know what? 500... I can give you 500."

>Was: $1.000.000
>Now: $500

"It's all I can offer you. It's an interesting relic, but I can't go higher."

>Marrona con pinta de ilegal
"800."

A little brown-skinned dwarf with clothing that made her look like a stereotypical dictator from the Middle East, with a bit of Hindu because they're all the same shit, makes a counteroffer for you.

>Was: $500
>Now: $800

>Rick
"And you are...?"

>Marrona con pinta de ilegal (Carmelita)
"I'm his representative."

...it's Carmelita, looking at her properly, she has the same face. But she does look different.

>Rick
"Huh, do you have a representative?" -you ask-

"Agh... You know what? 700. I give you 700 and I'm taking a risk."

He said it!

//


>That's why it's Son >>> Kane
Not ironically yes, I've always thought that little chink is quality. He's the backbone of Tottenham.

>Alexa all Premier League ends:
CUMMMOOOOOOON SPEEEEEHS (spurs) SCOOOOH SUM BLOODY GOOOOOOALS

>for me it was between tottenham and chelsea, because both are posh. but tottenham is more memeable and interesting kek
There's already a difference, yeah, I see Alex working well as either of the two, but I think Alexa fits too much with Tottenham. Chelshit gives another aura...
Although it would justify a bit the bad mood they carry kek

>>3417
>Trevor

>Agh... I can't give you that amount... you have to understand me. You know it's excessive... damn it, do you know what? 500... I can give you 500.

The haggling gets complicated. Both parties had their expectations, however, Trevor was losing the initiative if he only accepted reducing his price to the three digits. This was the opposite of what he wanted...

>That's all I can offer you. It's an interesting relic, but I can't go higher.

It is then that a HERO arrives.

>800

"¡...!"

>And you are...?

"Did you also see it?"

>I'm his representative.

As if it were a gift from heaven, the one least expected appears to put pressure on Rick. His rival stumbles, forcing him to use his secret technique...

>Agh... Do you know what? 700. I'll give you 700 and I'm taking a risk.

"Taking a risk." Once you hear those words, the negotiation is almost closed. You've brought Rick to the limit, but he decides what that limit is.

However, Trevor had a ace up his sleeve...

"Rick, you're forgetting something..."

Trevor rummages in his pocket and pulls out the cigarette that Luisa had given him, barely having smoked half I think, and if not then retcon

"It's true, the old man said it would sell for 500... Or rather..."

snap

He hits the cigarette with a finger, lighting it with just friction.

"Between 500 and 1000 dollars."

Trevor drops the bomb. Despite being drunk, he paid attention to what the other guy said. Exceeding the 500 price was barely a risk in this sale. There's an entire horizon beyond the three digits that they haven't even explored...

"I learned something in 17 years, it's that when I see something on television, I want it for myself."

He puts the cigarette in his mouth.

"This is America. If we don't see it on TV, it practically doesn't exist. The 90% of the country surely didn't know there were star notes. But now that they saw it on The Price of History? Demand is going to increase. If I sell it to you for 700, you won't sell it for 1000, you'll surely double that price in less than a week. Maybe triple it. The fair price would be that I ask you for $2000..."

"But there's something else you haven't taken into account..."

He puts a finger on the bill. "This isn't just a star note. From today on, it's the star note that came up on The Price of History... 3000$ for a historical and televised relic? It sounds like a joke. Give it a year and we'll be talking about 10 thousand."

"And what would I be left with? Practically nothing... Unless..."

He lifts the bill from the counter.

"I keep it and watch the price go up. I'll sell it to someone who wants it more. That money would be mine alone..."

He puts the bill back on the counter, this time covering it with his hand.

"I'm doing you a favor Rick... My last offer..."

He takes out the cigarette...

"5000 dollars... And believe me, I'm taking a risk."

He declares his price, letting all the smoke out.

>>3411
>Oracle
+$1200!
>current money: $2640

Finish work

That was a piece of shit. But hey, as they say, no one likes working or relating to people at work. It was time to go.

https://youtu.be/xnbAc6AHvYY?si=_tpWz2-x6W_MErsG▾>MAP!

Ohh yeah, things had changed. Now, with your wallet full of money earned through -null- effort, the world is yours to subjugate. Paper money rules in this dirty city, nah... In this stupid planet. And what would you do with a good pair of thousands of dollars, the best damn currency? Well, easy. Invest in your education... MARTIAL.

>☆☆☆loading...☆☆☆

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6eanxSWdY_E▾
Protip: gain charisma to get extra money

>☆☆☆full charge☆☆☆

When you arrive, maybe it wasn't what you imagined. The building is the most discreet, walls completely made of bricks with no paint, and polarized windows to the point of being opaque. If it weren't for the signs it has, which were written in Chinese, or Japanese or something like that, nothing would indicate it's a dojo instead of one of those ultra generic office buildings where a failed Iowa girl would work.

Anyway, although it would go unnoticed for anyone else, not for you. So without further ado, you enter the place in search of improving your skills...

>ellipsis

https://youtu.be/ZzRqtW1C0Zo?si=H6ScUMVz_lOobeHL▾
Inside... well, wow, were you really in the dojo? You find what seems like a kind of living room, some sofas, a table in the middle, a television and a guy sitting playing video games. On the screen, the NES Mario Bros jumping with quality, and avoiding every enemy as if it were a piece of cake.

>Subject
"Ah..." -pauses the game- I don't even remember if you could pause kekazo

The man leaves the control on the couch and does a spinning jump, ending up standing on the backrest of this with his hands in his pockets. White hair, blindfolded eyes... Hey, it's Gojo!

"Great, I was going to tell you we're closed, but it seems you have potential." -he lets himself fall and crouches to look at you closely- "From now on, I'm your handsome teacher Gollo Satoru." -well, almost- "And you are...?"

He straightens up.

"Ah. You'll start your training immediately. Now you're very weak. But you can surely learn something interesting... This seems appropriate for your level:"

>TIGER TECHNIQUES!
-¡Super form!: call the chaos emeralds to achieve a legendary transformation
<$500 to learn

-¡Third die!: Tired of only being able to do two miserable actions? Unleash the power to roll three dice with this incredible ability.
<$700 to be able to learn

-Doppelganger: Create a copy of yourself that mimics all your movements. But it must be tamed first, since it's a wicked copy.
<Free!

"Did you notice? The first one is Sonic's. Do you like Sonic?" -he asks- "These are basic techniques, but you have to learn one or you'll die without exploding your potential." -he shrugs-

>>3413
Opening your eyes, you find Kaguya in the middle of a murder. Yours. The girl is shocked because you haven't died, and it only gets worse once you let her arm, already piercing through you, go even further as if nothing. Sweat pours down her forehead, and though her eyes remain closed, she stares at you in stunned disbelief.

>Kaguya
+15%!
>Owen: 45%

"Agh..."

<Kaguya 48%

(It's... terrifying...)

"I'll... have to go all out..."

Kaguya stands up with visible effort.

<Kaguya 44%

She's really bleeding a lot. But she still had one last trick up her sleeve...

https://youtu.be/PCfiqY05BpA?si=LLB0mnCzx2sK0hFE▾
"...for my clan and for myself..."

<Kaguya 40%

She raises two fingers before her.

"I'll give everything for my revenge..."

She opens her eyes...

Heterochromia. One red, one purple. The Sharingan... and the Rinnegan. Keksito was too damn powerful She also lowers her mask completely, revealing her face. She's beautiful, no surprise there...

"FIRE STYLE: GREAT FIRE DRAGON JUTSU!"

She takes a deep breath and blows, launching a massive dragon made of fire.

1d120 = 39

Defensive, dodge: 1d120 = 65

>>3418
The negotiation is leaving you completely at a disadvantage. Rick didn't want to go any higher, and could've ended this with a simple 'tss, sorry, buddy'. And then, when you needed a hand the most, the smell of curry announced a firm, surprise counter-offer.

Just like those times a character pops up out of nowhere beside you in Ace Attorney's courtroom. A sandy-brown version of Carmelita, hardened by haggling from her sandy roots and by tech support scams. Without a doubt, extravagant enough to cause general confusion in the place.

>Rick
Sandy Carmelita
"Wha?!" -she startles, hadn't noticed her new, unusual scent-

However, Rick won't fall for it so easily. When he sees a colorful project on the table, he doesn't flinch and lays down his Full House. His last trump card, the 'I'm gambling' that makes Indian Carmelita sweat curry.

Rick
"Forgetting... something?"

You pull out the trash Luisa gave you. Carmelita offers you a lighter for more movies, but you ignore her.

>Chomli
"Ehh... You can't smoke inside..."

But Rick is too focused on you to pay attention. Things were about to turn... your way, or into shit. It was all or nothing.

>Rick
Chomli
Sandy Carmelita
"Me too, saar."

>Rick
"What are you trying to get at?"

Was: $700
>Now: $5000

>Sandy Carmelita
"Seems reasonable." -lies-

>Rick
"..."

She looks down, looks at you, looks to the side. Sighs... then turns her gaze to you with some pain.

"Thousand."

>Was: $5000
>Now: $1000

She extends her hand for you to shake. This proves it, it's final, she won't raise a cent more.

"Take it or leave it."

>Chomli
"Are you sure, Rick...?"

>Carmelita
(Take it, idiot, take it!, It's a fucking dollar with an asterisk!)

It's in your hands.

>>3423
When you didn't seem able to scratch off another peso... you throw another card that no one expected.

>Carmelita sandy
Rick
"Hm..."

Chomlí
"Snails..."

>Rick
"Joh... Great, it's a deal!"

He shakes your hand.

https://youtu.be/hNW-n2OJNXU?si=E4sGnTr7AiJGpYSW▾
"Come with me back to do the paperwork."

>Rick (confessional)
"I must say I didn't expect to spend that much. But the kid has a point... And the chain is nice. Haha."

>☆☆☆loading...☆☆☆

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6eanxSWdY_E▾
Pro tip: you can bring some food to the fights to recover health

>☆☆☆full load☆☆☆

Carmelita and you leave the place, you with a new stack of fresh bills.

>+$1001
>current money: $1150

>Carmelita
"Bro, you really scammed that bald guy..."

She mentions it, then steps forward a bit faster to block your path. She crosses her arms and looks at you seriously, in this new version of hers without glasses, there's nothing to hide her furrowed brow.

"but can you tell me what the hell you're doing in this state, brother?, don't you think you have things to attend to...? Like... I don't know..." -he raises his arms upwards- "The ranking!"

He looks around.

"...hm..." -although he doesn't dislike Vegas- "Do you... repeat that you were going to be around here?, tourism or...?"

If your intentions were touristy... Maybe he didn't have much problem with it.

Kek closed the deal on the price of the story

>>3412
>>3413
HiFive, gurls!

>>3420
"Why don't you move to ayyti if you like it so much?"

Oráculo presents himself as an ultra-enlightened ascended being, celibate involuntarily, truecel, volcel, redpilled, blackpilled, anti-Zionist, fully awake, pro-life, a washing machine, a refrigerator, and every other label spewed by people who scroll through Twitter twenty hours a day.

Angélica thinks about her net worth, calling it scant is generous. With no other option, she sets out to profit at the expense of some idiot executive in K-entertainment.

"The first step is accepting that you don't understand the world. And until you take that step, I won't speak to you again except to explain the jobs you choose."

In the darkness of her eyelids, I doubted more than once that the silence wasn't mutual.

"Oloraculo, I..." A hand was placed on his chest, externalizing pity for him. "You're not special, you're not an anarchist, you don't have autism, you don't have ADHD, you're not neurodivergent or any of those other stupidities to sell pills. You simply need to train social skills, get out of your cave, and exercise."

He's as stubborn as a rock sunk at the bottom of a river. Not even his self-help seminar, nor a hundred more, will make him reconsider. Not today. Not ever. In a verbal dead end, his few urges fit into the convex silhouette of his skull. He impales it with a finger, uncorks it, and drinks. His puffed-out cheeks flatten at the voracious speed he swallows; with five watery gulps*, the rind cracks between his fingers as he dents it with the pressure of the sip, as if the fruit breathed with him, siphoning liquid and air to return it in a tiny burp.

It doesn't last. Nothing good lasts. He wipes the corners of his mouth with the back of his hand and drops the fruit at his feet.

"Peace, Oloraculo."

Two of his fingers open into the old hippie V. The beach is now bare of people; surely Oloraculo can continue his guru-ing with some squirrel.

>>>Tiger's Dojo.

>protip: gain charisma to get extra money

(Does charisma make me Jewish?)

Dramatic pause. She hears and answers herself internally.

(No. No, no. I don't think so.)

She furrows her brow as if solving algebra and not some stupidity she invented herself.

(I mean, if that were the case, all bankers, tycoons, and politicians would be... well. Yes. But that's not the point.)

She self-censors the "haha minorities" joke and looks forward again. Her phone serves as a tour guide, leading her to an office complex that looks more like a clandestine abortion clinic. She studies the entrance with suspicion, knocks with her knuckles on the door, tries to get attention with a couple of anyone there? and when nothing but air answers, she decides to enter. The interior is a mausoleum of obsolete equipment:
A fan that sounds like a broken propeller and a bulky television connected to a prehistoric console. She raises her hand with her fingers clenched in a wave. Immediately, her jaw swings at right angles as she sees the most ultra-realistic cosplay of that guy from the tiki-taka edits.

"Great, I was going to tell you we're closed, but it looks like you have potential."
"You are..." She stomps her foot, thinking insistently, as if searching for wifi signal in her memory. "You are..." They look at each other. "You are..." Eureka! "The one from the Lady Gaga song," she proclaims with a wide grin.

https://youtu.be/-ckDEG_FHu8?si=IB_ilqs1eNZ09HvX▾
She hums it in a high-pitched voice. As she examines her up close, the girl takes a step forward with the pen she stole borrowed from Becky.

"C-Can you give me an autograph for my mom? She's a big fan of yours, uh, her name is Angelica Jhonson, and also one for my cousin, uh, his name is also Angelica Jhonson."

"From now on, I am your handsome professor, Gollo Satoru."

She stifles fangirl giggles against the fabric of her sleeve. Without blinking, she pokes and sniffs at inches of such delicate skin, examining muscle as if she were at a butcher shop. His arms were as thick as his back, they look designed to strangle bears and carry them like handbags. And he's so tall she has to crane her neck to look at him. The vertical distance forces her to take a deep breath.

"I-I-I-I-I am, a-and, I-I am, I am, I-I"

Where hormones reign, neurons don't. Her tongue slips and the pigments on her face flush; calling him handsome would be like calling a puddle an ocean. Gollo restarts her, showcasing his school's techniques, and what she sees accentuates one eyebrow in such a way that it seems to want to desert her face and seek a better life on another face.

> Super form!

She sticks out her tongue slightly, thoughtfully pressed against her cheek.

"Like Koku?"

> Third die!

"What..."

> Doppelganger!

"...the hell?"

She signed up for martial arts, not the basement sorcery club. Conjuring punches = yes. Conjuring entities = please no. At this point, she feels like she's being played, and that's not something she's going to let slide. Without taking her eyes off him, she pulls out her wallet, counts from 100 to 1500, and deposits them into his hand with a tap.

"If it's true, I'll give you double. If it's false, I want you to take off your shirt and d-dance."

She's betting money she doesn't even have, after all, magic doesn't exist outside of Cucamonda's mind.

"Give me all three."

"Did you realize? The first one is Sonic's. Do you like Sonic?"

She swings her head from one shoulder to the other as if saying "so-so."

"Sonic? What a weird way to say Sonichu. I absolutely love Sonichu. Especially when he learns to escape real-life problems by running really fast. I relate."

It's impossible not to know him; Christian Weston Chandler is an undeniable cultural vector of modern society. In his works, one can trace echoes of the Eastern shonen tradition, while from the Western hybrid perspective, the monomyth of the hero. It's hard to believe Marvel hasn't signed him yet to bring him to the big screen.

"Did you know Sonichu has like ten girlfriends? I want that. I want that power."

She says with dead seriousness, her fist clenched to the point of grinding. The tendon vibrates up her forearm. It looks like she's about to break or break something.

The three A's: Adored, Admired, and Affluent. Angelica wants the complete package and would sweat for it.

Congratulations on being free OPato, sniff Sniff, I'm not jealous at all, sniff

>>3424
>Trevor

>Great, it's a deal!

"Excellent."

The two dealers shake hands. The haggling session concludes with a done deal. Trevor had turned one dollar into a thousand, and Rick had gotten a dollar and a chain...

>Come with me to the back to do the paperwork.

"Yeah."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b9hBHt317mw▾
>Trevor (confessional slinked behind Rick kek)

"This is live, right? Greetings to mom and dad, to my cousin Brian who went to work in Manhattan. Greetings to the guy who gave me a job too, I don't remember his name but I wouldn't be here without him."

He makes some hand gestures https://i.kym-cdn.com/editorials/icons/mobile/000/014/084/67fp1.jpg They were from his ex-gang that broke up 999 years ago. "This is for those who know."

He makes a phone gesture. "And this is for Sabrina Carpenter. I know you watch this show, call me."

--

He leaves the pawn shop with his companion, and more importantly, with his new money. It was too tempting to take a good sniff of all this fresh cash.

snifffff

"Hahhh... There are people who live without understanding this pleasure..." Like communists... That almost reminds him of something he had pending to do. Almost...

>can you tell me what the hell you're doing in this state, brother?, Don't you think you have things to attend to...?

"Yeah, yeah... I'm trying to remember."

>The ranking!

"Ah. You mean that."

Yes...

"I thought the umpa lumpas were fictional." He completely ignores the main topic.

"Does that mean Willy Wonka is real too? Didn't they try to sue him for that forced labor crap? The guy also killed a bunch of kids in front of their parents, imagine how much money they would have gotten from him..."

He still didn't realize it was Carmelita. He assumed 'representative' was some kind of bluff that only Rick understood.

>Could you... repeat what you were going to do around here?, Tourism or...?

"Hmm..."

He takes one last drag from the shitty cigarette, sucking it pause until nothing of its miserable existence remained.

He drops it on the floor and crushes it.

"Whatever the alcohol tells me."

He was going to take advantage of the poison left in his system, and if it wasn't enough? Well, he would drink more, that's what the money was for, and for that...

"We're in Las Vegas."

He pulls out the car keys, starts Betty, and throws himself into the seat.

"...We should do whatever the hell we want..."

The engine starts to roar, giving Carmelita the opportunity to make a decision. Go with him, or return to her mundane life?

"First stop... The North Star..."

---

... And that's how Trevor had the craziest night of his life in Las Vegas. Gambling, drinking, partying, marrying a complete stranger, robbing a bank, losing all the money after doing business with the wrong person, but ending up with only $1001 after a final high-stakes bet, and other things that OP and I will skip with the excuse that he had a hangover, because I'm already eager to start the second day kek

>>3425
Oracle is not going to Haiti because the idea is to change the cradle of the system, you didn't go to the tiger's dojo for personal reasons that get lost in time once the map marks it as a point of interest.

Aside from the sloppy presentation, which could be grounds for criticism... your professor turns out to be none other than...

>Gollo
current money: $1440

<Sonic? What a weird way to say Sonichu. I really, really love Sonichu.

"He was talking about Sonic, the blue hedgehog from the games created by Sega." -he's a GAMER-

<(...)I relate

"Ah, not me... Normally problems run away from me. It's a bit boring."

<Did you know Sonichu has like ten girlfriends? I want that. I want that power

"Ahh..." -he smiles, he always seems carefree, he doesn't even react to your weak little fist- "That's easy." -for him- "Now let's gooo, we have to train." -he says and grabs your arm, both of you disappear-

...

1/2 for convenience

>>3425
Instantly, so fast you can barely process how quickly it happened, you are in another room. You didn't even get to blink or anything, it was, without a doubt, teleportation. Your teacher lets you go, and lets you understand where you are, it is this time what you would expect from a dojo. Several meters of tatami and a trio of practice dummies planted in a triangle formation a few meters from you.

Gollo walks until he is a sporting distance from you. He holds up two fingers and smiles at you.

"Alright, pay attention. I'll explain each of the powers and you choose which scene we'll enact." -or if you want to do all three at once- although I would recommend learning doppelganger separately for convenience, it's your decision

"Let's start with super form. It's easy... just concentrate on calling the chaos emeralds... And roll a 100-sided die." -he tilts his head slightly forward-

1d100 = 12

7 colored gems come flying at full speed and start spinning around Gollo at full speed.

"Sonic has many transformations, did you know? You can access all of them with these chaos emeralds. But... not you yet. Also, each gem allows you to use chaos control. But you'll learn that later."

"As you can see, I don't activate them yet. But when you choose to transform, you in particular will have access to three possible transformations: wolf girl, golden knight, and darkspine. They aren't the strongest, but they are what you can achieve."

Super form:
01 - 50 wolf girl
51 - 79 - golden knight
80 - 100 - darkspine Viceroy

//

"You don't know the triple die? Wow, you're weak... Just roll three dice. Like this."

He raises his arms, throws a punch.

1d100 = 47

Another.

1d100 = 51

And one more.

1d100 = 61

It's fast and simple... But effective. That was the best way to learn the triple die.

"And that's it. Just concentrate and try to throw three consecutive punches." -he puts his hands in his pockets-

//Doppelganger

"Ahh... That one is a bit dangerous, unless you're me."

"But something tells me it'll be easy for you... that's why it was free for you."

"Just do this."

He holds up his two fingers at his chest.

"Normally you roll your dice like this, right?"

1d100 = 21
1d100 = 97

Well... Yes.

"Concentrate on calling your doppelganger... and roll them this way."

1d100 = 27 1d100 = 2

Next to him, a similar figure materializes from the air itself, but with less rizz. Also with silver hair, imitating the pose of the original.

"And it will imitate all your movements."

He waves at you with one hand, his copy does the same.

"Bleeeh" -he puts his hands next to his ears and wiggles his fingers in a typical taunt, his doppelganger imitates him, the same when he straightens up and puts his hands in his pockets- "See? Ah. But the first time it will attack you."

And, another thing you've noticed is that the doppelganger doesn't speak.